New Follower, Eh?

Me kid brother Gogmoth were in his garrison yesterday when a certain druid done walked in lookin' fer work. Turned out what he had an opening fer a celebrity artist what could kick arse, so he hired her on the spot an' put her ta work. Summoned up an imp with a set of colored pencils an' everything.

Now, any you buggers seen a fiery belfadin wanderin' around?

Then And Now: The Way We Was

If'n ya reads this blog, then ya know what pictures of me an' the rest of the Team be kinda a big part of it. An' if ya don't read it, well then ya ain't readin' this an' so there ain't really no reason fer me ta done fini

 Vidyala had this post the other day where she had this pic of herself from the early days and a pic of her today self. I thought were kinda interestin', so I went an' dug through the old crap (includins the crap in me original blog, Diary of an Upwardly Mobile Orc) and found the earliest pic fer a bunch of us. Then I took a brand new pic of everybodies (without warnin' so nobodies had time fer ta go change an' make theyselves presentable haha!). Is a few haircut changes a lotta gear changes, heirlooms, heirlooms swapped, transmogrifyin', an' tranmopathy goin' on. We's like that.

Anywho, here we is:

Ratshag Jan 26, 2007

There be me, jumpin' up an' down like a loon just 'cause I'd done made it ta the Stonetalon Mountains. Whoo hoo, a new zone. Way fer ta start the blog off with class and dignity, kid. Gear's changed, of course. Id done tried out some new hairstyles in Northrend but ended up goin' back ta me gray and braids look. Just felt right, ya know. What don't show is the miles on the feet an' the notches on the belt, but you buggers alreadies knew about them.

Ellspeth April 4, 2007

Ellspeth, the team's first 'lock. Puld her outta a Silvermoon orphanage an' set her ta work. Still the same hair. Still the same showin' off her skin. Still psychotic as a glubbernugger.

Gogmoth December 22, 2007

Me kid brother. We was inta 'locks there fer a bit there, weren't we? no real changes here.

Danger Mouse January 9, 2008

Mouse. Still impatient, still a killer, still sportin' that natural dead hairstyle. She done hadda make a name change when she joined me on the Cenarion Circle serververse, but that be about all. And we still know what her real name is.

Ratdorf January 15, 2008

Me, transmogrified inta a dwarf priest. That's right, I were inta transmogrifyin' before it were cool. Over the names I done changed me official name in this form from "Ratshag" ta "Ratdorf", and I done lost the Santa Claus look fer a shorter, braided black-colored stylin'. Get fewer mice livin' in it, that way.

Galertruby January 21, 2008

He's far too busy bein' profound fer ta actuallies go aware or do anythin'. But we loves him anywho.

Alayda February 15, 2008

Alayda the festive shaman. She likes fer ta change her hair every six months or so, so the blue topknow be long gone. Is currently a green mohawk. Still got her tusks though - Alayda be a proud troll beauty an' ain't got no interest in tryin' fer ta look like a elf girl.

Palintera April 15, 2008

Pali's come a long way in Cataclysm, in every respect. She's changed her appearance several times, but always ends up comin' back ta wear she started. 'Course, a lotta the time she looks like a big laser-firin' chicken, but we ain't showin' that today.

Orctacles May 19, 2008

See if'n ya can tell what changed here.

Phoenicia June 14, 2008

The Red Hawt Dwarf Chick is still Red Hawt, roflcopter braids an' all, even if'n ya cain't see'em in this pic. What do be different is she started off prot an' now be fury fury screamin-like-a-loonie fury.

Kinnavieve October 9, 2008

Kinna came on board right at the end of the Burninatin' Crusade, an' I trained her up with the hopes what she could be me replacement as the Team's raider. An' she done succeeded an' made me real proud. Changed her hair and got a lot tougher, but inside she's still that little lumberjack's daughter from Nowhereshire, Elwynn Forest what were taggin' along after me. How'd we get both of us in the same picture? That be a good fuhggin' question....

Vyprania November 14, 2008

Requiescat in pace September 16, 2010

Don' really feel like talkin' 'bout Vyp, just now.

Maurice December 21, 2008

Still the Death Knight of Loooove. Still sportin' that 70s pornstache an' drivin' the wimmenz of Stormwind .... elsewhere.

Jinnik July 10, 2010

Heirlooms. Hard fer ta shake'em, although at some point they's gonna get transmogged inta Ruthless Gladiatiors. Not a lot's changed fer the team's only healer, although she been spendin' more time in BGs than dungeons of late.

The Warrior With No Name August 5, 2010

Still sportin' a mustache so sharp it'll pierce his helmet. Still got no name, even though he done gone from bein' a lowlie bank alt ta GM of the Free Radicals.


Some of the Team members, especiallies thems what joined after the Shattering, don't really done gotten much attention here in the blog, at least nots yet. Mebbe some other time there'll be a retrospectalizin' fer Fink an' Creighton an' Goblin Hunter Boy (By Night Known As Fezziwhig) an' Justina Price Worgen. But that won't be today, 'cause then it would be now an' not then.

TRANSMOGALYPSE! Gogmoth: Thug's Life

Warlocks, they's gots ta keep they's minions in line. Is different ways fer ta do it - feedin'em souls, burnin' they's psyches, makin' promises of freedom what ya don't intends ta keep. Me kid brother Gogmoth, he likes fer ta supplement these with a little intimidationizings and an occasional slap upside the head. He finds is kinda hard fer ta glare a doomguard inta soilin' its loincloth when yer a big orc in a purple dress, though. So come the transmogalypse, he's plannin' on goin' with a more hardcore look:

A Laughing Skull cap he got off a skull what weren't laughin', the Soulstealer Mantle fer the shoulders, and good ol' Netherweave tunic and gloves. Then he's bought up the Silver-thread pants, boots, and sash ta finish the look. And fer waivin' around and lookin' like he could actually lop a head off, he done borrowed Taragaman the Hungerer's Cursed Felblade.

Not bad, lil' bro. Ya almost done convincalized me what yer a tough guy.

Is Where Gogmoth Goes Ta The Frozen North

Yeah, Northrend. Where the wind blows fuhggin' cold, and the glubbernunkin' dead walk the earth. Home of the walrus dudes and the voluptuous walrus wimmenz what gives good walrus lovin'. Northrend, where the murlocs talk (kinda sorta) and duke it out with them furries in the Basin. Northrend, where Freya's milkshakes done bring all the boys and girls ta the yard, and Hodir remembers ya from the mountains. Northrend, where Alex wears her climate-controlled thong and the Broom Hildas wear icicles. Northrend, land of Really Big Worms and Really Confusicating Oculus.

So tells me, little brother, what be yer first thoughts of this brave new world ya done made it to?

"This stupid had keeps falling down over me eyes and it tickles me beard."

Gogmoth Has a Warlock Question

"Well, go on. Ask'em."

"I dunno know about this. What if ..."

"What if what?"

"What if they laugh at me?"

"Who's gonna laugh at you? Braids? Hydra? TJ? Pellegri? They's me friends - they ain't gonna laugh at you."

"I don't think you really understand warlocks, Ratshag. We're evil people. We enjoy making other people miserable."

"But you don't."

"That's just because I'm a nerd. If I were a hardcore warlock I'd take just as much pleasure in other peoples' misery."

"Argh. Look, Gogmoth, you wanna know the answer or not?"

"Well, I do, but ... no, nevermind. It's a stupid question."

"There ain't no stupid questions - just inquisitivating pain-in-the-arse idiot brothers."

"*sulk*"

"So? You gonna ask already?"

"... maybe ... i don't know ... you could for me ..."

Great googly moogly. Fine. I'll ask. Who ever heard of a shy orc? Sheesh.

Gogmoth Wants To Know what's the best minion to use in Altarec Valley, and do ya use it best? Ya see, he's been wearing the same amulet what Sally Whitemane gave him fer twenty seasons now, and he's looking fer something a little less tarnished. Like this one here. Now Gog's a monster at soloing mobs - I's seen him take down elites two seasons higher than him. But in the head-to-head clashes ya get there, where once yer targeted by ten or so of the other side yer arse goes down fast, it be hard to tell what's working. So. Should he be using the felpuppy, what be highly rated fer PvP, or bring in the felguard with the goofy name since he went to the trouble of speccing fer it? And should he leave it on defense to protect his clothie arse, or send it after particular targets, or just tell it to be aggresive and find it's own targets? And if you 'locks out there is truly evil, you'll tell him ta put it inta baby seal mode. Heh.

Anywho, he's a pathetic shy little orc of a warlock, but I does love the bugger, so if any you 'locks out there got some answers fer him I'd sure appreciatificate. Thankee.

Some Warlocks is Still No Fun

From Warlock 101:
Really the only spell you’ll ever need as a Warlock in a 5-man instance is Howl of Terror.

I finds the image of this really funnies, and would be happy to pay the subsequent repair bill. But when I recommended it to Gogmoth, he says it would be puerile to do so. No sense of fun in that kid, I tells ya.

Get Thee to the Plaguelands!

So I's walking through the Lower City in Shattrath the other day, when I turns the corner and bang! I walks into me kid brother Gogmoth.

"The fuhg you doing in Outland?" I asks him.

"Nice to see you too, Ratshag. I've reached my 58th season - I've earned the right to be out here."

"But yer supposed to be in Un'goro Crater, killing oozes and stuff. And then you need to get to the Plaguelands and take care of all them Scourges what I never got around to. Then you can come to Outland."

"But Rats - you always said that the really good loot is in Outland. If I go to the Plaguelands I'll have to use my plain old Azeroth gear."

"Gog, Gog, Gog. Remember the plan. Do as many quests as you can in Azeroth, that way you'll reach 70 a lot sooner once you do come to Outland. And then you'll make more money for the Team, questing at your maximum. Maybe you should go to Silithus as well - lots of bugs there I never took care of."

"But Rats that's no fun!"

"What's fun got to do with it? Think of the Team, boy!"

"But when you reached 58, you dropped everything and ran straight for the Black Portal. You didn't finish your quests. For all I know, you were in the middle of a fight."

"This ain't about me, Gogmoth. It's about you doing what I tell you. Get yer arse to the Plaguelands!"

"But -"

"Plaguelands!"

"But I -"

"Plaguelands, or I'll tell mom!"

"Fine, I'll go to the dang Plaguelands. But I'm not going to Silithus. I hate those dang bugs as much as you do."

"All right then."

So he portalled back to Azeroth, and I went looking for a diversion or two to calm me nerves. Imagine, the nerve of that boy.

Maybe I'll send DangerMouse to Silithus, after she's got some more seasons under her belt. She's a walking corpse - how much can bugs creep her out?

Some Warlocks is No Fun

Well, me kid brother Gogmoth sez he's learned howta summon an Infernal. Is like a demon, but artificial. He won't tell me its name though - sez I'd just make fun. (Is will be picture, but not ready yet - soonish)

Thing about Infernals is, they ain't really under full control the way imps and voidwalkers and them hot numbers with the wings and hooves is. Ya gets about five minutes, then it decides it wants to call its own shots, thankee very much. And its idea of fun is to stomp and blast everything in sight. So the warlock's gotta keep re-enslaving it to keep it on task, which gets ta be a pain after a while. Which is why ya don't see infernals parked outside the tavern while they master pops in fer a quick pint or seven.

So I sez to Gog he should make the most of this. Summon up his new toy, kill furblogs or whatevers he's up to in Felwood fer a few minutes, then scampers down to Aastraanaaar just before the timer dings. Then mister big-burning-pile-o-rocks can party it up with the guards there. Maybe the flight master or general goods vendor too, while it's at it, as well as any unlucky buggers what happens to be standing around.

See, I don't like Aastraanaaar. Fer one thing, it be hard to spell. Fer another, when I were a young orcling, twenty or so seasons under me belt, I got this job to deliver a message to Zoram'gar Outpost, way over on the far side of Ashenvale. I'd never been ta Ashenvale before, and after the wide opens of Durotar and the Barrens, all them eyes peeking out from behind all them trees creeped me out (remembers, I were young). So I stuck to the roads, 'cause I knew that were the safe way to travel. And as I's running down the road, I sees on me map that there be a town up ahead. Even betters, I thinks. I can take a break, rest me feet, maybe gets some horizontal refreshments before I continues down this road. But just when I gets to the town gate, two Nelf guards jump out and beat the crap outta me. Hey! Not fair sneaking up on a honest travellar like that! Were very deceptive, letting them Alliance buggers have they's own town, right in the middle of where I needed to be going. But I digressifies. Point is, I don't like Astraaanar.

"No, Ratshag, I will not summon an Infernal just to let it loose on an innocent town. That would be puerile," Gog sez.

Hummph. Some warlocks is No Fun, even when they is yer brother. I thought they was all supposed to be, ya know, Eeee-ville.

Puerile. Hummph.



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Hey, Klakilaki! Be a sport and tell me what "puerile" means, wouldya? Thankee.