Friday, October 15, 2010

Ashenvale

The word was, Kaldorei only. It wass going to be deep in the foressts of Ashenvale, in a place sacred to the Ssentinels. The funeral would be off-limits to outsiderss. People without long ears and purple ssskin would not be permitted.

Fuck that ssshit.

I am Danger Mouse. I go where I want.

So, Legs, here we are. Quite a pair, aren’t we? The dead chick and the even deader chick. I told you not to be a hero up there in Northrend, didn’t I? Sstick to the shadowss, stab them in the back, pick off the weak, let the Ssstrong and the Ssstupid take the pounding in our place. But you had your vendetta, didn’t you? An oath to keep, vengeance to take, and you weren’t going to back off. Not ever.

Fool.

I’d been sskulking about outside the gates of Asstranaar for six hours when the procession finally got their assses in gear and headed out. Everyone was in their finest outfitss, with braids and sparkles and leafsss and other doodads. They had a real nice coffin for you, Legss, lots of trees and birds and ssstars carved on it, with silver inlayss. It was open to the sky, which I think you would have liked. Although ssome prude had lain a strip of cloth over your face, where your eyess would have been. They had the coffin on a caisssson being pulled by an honor guard in very shiny armor - I guess nightssabres make pretty loussy beasts sof burden, and kodos or furbolgss are beneath Kaldorei dignity. Anyway, I followed them down the road for about five miles, then we turned off onto a ssomewhat overgrown trail, which led us to this sspot.

You had about a hundred folkss turn out for you, Legs. Tyrande Whisperwind and Sshandriss Feathermoon were both there, and Tyrande even talked for a bit. It was in Darnasssian, of course, so I didn’t undersstand any of it, but i thought it sounded suitably ssolemn and praise-heaping. From their tabardss, I could spot people from The Left Claw, and Parallel, and Aetherial Circle. There were also a few ssporting worn and faded tabardss with a design I couldn’t place, though it seemed familiar. I recognized Ratterss’ old friend Bellwether, and Kinnavieve’s friend Shianti. And of course the druid twinss were there. That Feral chick was even fully dressed - never sseen her do that, unless sshe on armor and was looking for a fight. Palintera, she got up and sstarted to talk. Too bad you weren’t here to translate for me; I was curiouss to know what sshe was saying. She broke down before sshe finisshed, though; completely losst it. Feralicious had to come up and lead her away. I think she was crying too. I actually felt bad for them, you know. I mean, they annoy me (maybe becausse they’re like a hundred years old but act like teenagerss, and I never got a chance to, I don’t know), but I know they cared about you too. Ssucksss all around, I guess.

After a while, everyone was done talking. They closed the coffin, and lowered you into the ground, and covered you with dirt. And then they left, and it’s jusst you and me, Legs. You aren’t coming out of there, are you? No more rebirthss for Vyprania. You know, all these yearss, I’ve never missed my eyes. Not until now. Because I really want to cry too, and I fucking can’t. Not a lot of people are willing to be friendss with the dead girl, the one with half a face and flesh rotting away, and kind of mean, but you were. And I--

I really--

I really miss you. I wissh you hadn’t died.

....

....

....

I gotta go.

Legs, I don’t know much about godss, and religion, and all that. I pretty much leave them alone, and hope they’ll do the ssame to me. Yeah, I tell people to “embrace the Shadow”, but that’s mostly because I know it makes them uncomfortable. I know, though, that Elune was sstill your goddess, after everything, and I hope, I really do, that wherever you are now, you are with her. But if you aren’t, if that just wassn’t in the cardss, then may the Dark Lady watch over you.

:: vanish ::

12 comments:

Kayeri said...

::grabbing the paper towels since the kleenex box is empty::

That was just... beautiful...

Maureen Lycaon said...

*sniffles*

I've been following Vyprania's story since you began it. That's a beautiful end. Sad, but beautiful.

Eustashius said...

a magnificent tribute.

Liore said...

Look, I am one of those terrible "lolrp" people. I avoid it at all costs. I don't really care about characters and plot twists, and don't even get me started on lore. I am here for serious internet dragon killing, and everything else is damned silly.

.... but man I love Need More Rage, and this bit brought a tear to my cold jaded eye for poor Vyprania.

Just don't tell anyone, okay?

devotchka said...

Quit making me cry, man! *sniff*

Tracey said...

[crying, can't comment - but you should hear that this was read]

StaggerLee said...

Bravo!

Sedna said...

You would think that by now I would know better than to read this at work. /sniff

Oh, Vyp. Oh, Mouse.

Sedna said...

And I just realized that Mouse has Vyp's bunny.

...

BAAAAAAWWWWWWWWW

Orvillius@Coilfang said...

Ratters when are they going to hire you to write WoW novels? I care more about Vyprania and Mouse than Jaina and Arthas.

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Lui said...

Ratters

This is an old post but.... still brings a tear to my eye *SOBS*