Is Where Vyprania Is A Trendsetter

Well, buggers is runnin' all around Azeroth with they's Charm Collector's Kits, ripping pieces off of everything they kill lookin' fer bits they can use fer ta make charm bracelets fer the powers what be. Now, I can see Varian or Sylvanas goin' fer such doodads, but to Tyrande Whisperinyerear really want a bracelet made of wolvar teeth and murloc toes? I dunno; power do weird things ta buggers.

I gots ta say, though, that the idea of turnin' pieces inta jooleries ain't a new one. Vyprania be the team's grand master joolcrafter on the Alliance side, and she been doin' such fer a long time. See them three danglies hangin' off her left ear? Yeah, they's all pretty what with the gold and thorium figglries and the black pearls, but when she started they was the index fingers of Noth, Gothik, and Grand Slam Faerlina. That necklace Phoenicia's wearing? Made from Hakkar the Soulflayer's toothies. Prince Keleseth's thighbone got scrimshawed down inta some real purdy chopsticks fer me ta eat me Chineses with. Galertruby shoots craps with dice carved from Keli'dan the Breaker's broken skull. In a different style, Vyp's got Moragg's big middle eyeball all shrunken and preservified and encased in plastics hangin' from a chain on her right ear. This bein' a family blog and all, would be impropers fer me ta tell ya where Ellspeth wears Instructor Razuvious' similarly treated 'nads.

So, go pry the teeth outta that dead ghoul and make yer bracelets fer yer 'chievements. Just keep in mind ya can put a little more efforts inta it and get ya something really unique.

How It Really Went Down

Not-Yet-Dead King: I'm not dead yet.

Living Paladin: 'Ere, he says he's not dead.

Dead King: Well, he will be soon. He's very wounded.

LP: I can't announce victory with him like that. It's against regulations.

N-Y-D K: They used saronite bombs to exploit an in-game mechanic. I think I'll go for a walk.

DK: You're not fooling anyone, you know. Isn't there anything you could do?

/hotfix
/72-hour ban
/Not-yet-dead King dies

LP: No king, no king, la la la la la la...

DK: Idiot! There must be a king! Otherwise the restless Scourge will be an even greater threat to this world. Control must be maintained. Otherwise they might go bar-hopping with that hooligan Ratshag and his friends. Go rhino-tipping in the Borean Tundra. Run Freya's panties up the flagpole! There must always be .... a Lich King.

/ominous music

LP: This means I get to be king? Cool!

Dead Paladin: Oh hell no! I got poisoned, I got burned by that big red bitch, Kinnavieve ran of with my shield, I got this really wicked "Flame on!" action here - I should be king!

LP: Dude, you want some ointment or something?

DP: No, just gimme the crown.

LP: Oh, okay

/crown on Dead Paladin's head

DP: Sucker! I mean, uh, go tell them that the Lich King is dead.

LP: All right. Say, do you mind if we do this again, only with more, like, gravitas? I want to Fraps it.

DP: No one may know what was done here today!

LP: Oh, don't worry, it's just for my personal use. Not like it's going to end up on YouTube or anything.

DP: In that case, sure. Not-yet-dead king, you want to take it from the top?

N-Y-D K: Father! Is it.... over?

Dwarven Cursing

Yeah, i got no fuhggin' clue what she were sayin' neither. But Kinna said she sounded 'frickin pissed'.

Is Where Maurice Finds A New Interest

Well, hello there, my sweet little apple blossom. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Maurice, the Death Knight of Looove, and I am preparing a Heart Strike just for you.

Morani? What a lovely little name, for such a lovely little person. Did you know it sounds like "moron"? Ha ha, it is to laugh. I made a joke, did you not see? Now you must laugh too.

Oh, so you have heard of me? I am not surprised, for the ladies, they do talk. No doubt, many who have swooned from my overwhelming presence have gone home to tell their friends. They discuss how wonderful it would be to possess me, do they not? Perhaps some yearn for something delightfully outré, such as a ménage à cinq, or perhaps even à sept? Ho ho, they are so delightfully naughty.

You are a paladin, I see. It is a noble calling is it not? I was once a paladin. Maurice, the Paladin of Looove they called me, the scrumptious ladies of Lordaeron, and oh how the swooned as I walked past. I wore glorious armor, and wielded a mighty sword.... Ah-ha, but I do still wield a mighty sword. No doubt you are anxious to see it.

Ah, so it is Kinnavieve has mentioned me to you? Yes, my jaw has healed nicely, thank you. Such a feisty vixen, that one. So full of energy and a zest for life. Clearly she wishes me to pursue her more, but I am too cunning for such a simple game. No, I am biding my time, laying a trap, waiting for her needs and urges to become so great that she must needs come to me.

She has been training you to be a Soldier of the Light too? Ha ha, that is noble of her. But my sweet little nectarine of passion, you are a dwarf! You are too short to be a soldier! And it is a hard, cold life. Come, let me carry you off to my bunker of love, where you will rest on silk sheets, and smoke the finest hashish in the hookah, and I will teach you how to use your tongue to-

**WHAM**

-a- a -i-e -i-, -y -e-i----u- -e-u-ia. -o -o- -o--y, -y -a- --a-- -ea- -oo-, a-- --e- -e -a- --ay --e -a-e a-ai-! Au -e-oi-!

Is Worth ... I Dunno ... A Whole Buncha Thousand Wordses

Here be some pics of what Team Ratshag and our frinds been up to the past few months. Feel frees ta make up yer own stories.

Yeeeeeeee-haaaaaaaaaw!!!!!!
Army of the Dead. The Scarlet Crusade's worst nightmare.

Hell yeah I'm checkin' out her boobs. What'd ya expects?

Unannounced visitors. Preparations must be made....

I pimped my ride.

Bloodied Arcanite Reaper HOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Team Suptail gets its first member to the level cap!

Is like half the Persians.

Morani, Queen of the Ogres

Buffing up for the Illidari Council.

Is Where Ratter's RL Avatar Says Sumthin'

Hello, you buggers.

Me RL avatar, he got sumthin' he be wantin' ta say to all of ya. Now, he's a good lad, does his dailies and all, but he do suffer from the delusion what he be the real one and I'm the one what be a buncha pixels. Hehehe. What a noob. But we's gonna humor the kid, and listen ta his wordifying.

/break the fourth wall

Hi everyone.

I wanted to take a few minutes to let everyone know some things that have been going on here in the real world, and explain a bit about why I had to take a few months off.

Back when I was raiding with Aetherial Circle over on Drenden, we had a resto druid in the guild by the name of Shianti. There were a number of characters in that outfit, but in addition to being a really good raider she had a personality that was funny and colorful and nice, and it felt natural to include her in some of my posts. Whether she was trying to farm Badges of Justice or flirting with Maurice or helping Kinnavieve in her attempts to get some epic pants to drop, it was always fun to have her here.

Last year, Shianti and I started getting to know each other outside of the game. Instead of Shianti and Ratshag we became Julie and Michael. We found we had a lot of things in common, one of which turned out to be a strong mutual attraction. We began flying out to see each other for weekends, which turned into longer and longer visits. She applied for a nursing job in my hometown, and was offered a position for significantly better pay than what she was making. We made plans on how we wanted to spend our lives together. Things were going great.

In October, we got hit with several pieces of bad news. By far the biggest of these though was that Julie was diagnosed with Stage 3 breast cancer. To fight it, she immediately had to start four months of chemotherapy, with surgery to follow. Of course, this meant putting our plans on hold and focusing on just getting through the here-and-now. Putting the time and effort into working on this silly little blog just was something I didn't have the heart for at that time, so I put up my "gone fishing" post.

One of the good things to come out of Julie's cancer has been the overwhelming support and encouragement we have gotten from our friends and family, both in the real world and in WoW. If this story sounds familiar, yes, my Julie is the same Julie that John the Big Bear Butt Blogger and all the other great people in the Sidhe Devils guild (where we currently have our Alliance toons) organized the Raid for the Cure for. It was a really thoughtful gesture, and the effort and enthusiasm that people put into it, as well as the many generous donations to the Susan G. Komen for the Cure charity, really meant a lot to both of us.

So now, three months later, how are things? Julie is two-thirds of the way through the treatment. It's a rotten process, with a lot of nausea, bone pain, fatigue, hair loss and lots of other minor crap. But the tumors have all shrunk significantly, and some have gone away completely. Her odds of surviving the next five years have gone up a lot. She had to postpone starting her new job, of course, but they were very understanding and it looks like it is all go for her to start in March. (It helps that she is awesome nurse and they really really want her ;) ) Things are looking up, and I felt ready to start thinking about blogging again.

One last thing - I wanted to say thanks for all the lovely comments, both when I stopped in October and when I started again this week. Need More Rage is something I enjoy writing, and I am glad so many of you enjoy reading it. Okay, enough of my yapping, let me hand you back to the orc.

Yeah huh. Great googly moogly that boy talked a lot, but it seemed real fuhggin' importants ta him. Okies, that's all fer today, all though if yer intersted is a post from Vyprania recentlies over at Need More Words. Is all serious and emotionals and whatnots, so is there and not here.

Is Guess Who

You raiders thought you done finished off Naxxramas last year. Cleared the wings, broke down the doors ta Kel'thingamabob's sanctum, killed the cat, brought it down in flames. Course you thought that was it. But then, so did them buggers what did the same out in the Plaguelands three years ago. Ol' Arthas be a slippery bluggernubber, though, and he went and respawned the whole damn place fer ta cause mischief up yer arses while ya be chargin' inta the Ice Cream Citadel.

Is not to worry though. We few, we happy few, we band of buggers in the Purge got yer backs. Tonight we busted in and told Patches it were time to play. Was only eight of us: Zinzi what Gives Good Resurrection, Tarsius the grumpy Druid, Bash (not, not that one, the other Bash), Rym with his arcane blasts set to Hocus Pocus, Throttle the Tinker, Mr. Hoof (all tan and rested after a few months off), Big Bad Guun, and yers truly. We had on our shiny new epics bought with Emblems of Welfare, and while we'd mostly none of us been there before, we meant business.
Patches is a big fella, but not really any brighter than Mograth the Death Nugget, and me and Big Guun had no troubles standing him up. Took a while fer ta get the healing sorted out, but once it were he went down like so much uncooked maggot-infested meat. Is more ta go, but we's gonna extend that raid lockout thingy 'til Naxx be secured. Again. Fer the third time.

Oh, and by the ways? I's back.