Prince Of Where, Exactlies?

This happened a while ago, but I didn't talk about it then 'cause I's talkin' 'bout it now.

"You face not Malchezaar alone, but the legions I- oh, bugger..." 

And with that, the Free Radicals done completed they's first raid. Was a melee-heavy group, so evens with explanationizings aforehands the Enfeeblents done took a heavy toll. But Dran done stood tall and slapped on her Aspect of the Hare and burned the glubbernudder down before the infernals got too nasty. Meanwhiles Xan did the amazingly virile gig and Gasket and Felbane stood in the back in they's sissy robes and smacked whatever healy buttons weren't on cooldown. So yay on them. And, sure, why not, grats ta Tavia, Yldarric, Scaith, and the Warrior With No Name, evens though they mostlies just lay on the floor like lazy-arsed buggers.

Ah, The Finer Things In Life

Happily, some of them are still casual. Like raiding Kara with a small group of 70s. Kara is so fine, it's even made with white wine (makes no sense, I know, but is what the original mustard commercial said, just go with it you buggers). Kara at 70 goes well even without flasks, justice points, hit capping, tankspot videos, buggers what know where they's going, and, of course, fish feasts. So enjoy one of life's finer pleasures.

"Pardon me, would you have the heads of Attumen, Moroes, the Maiden of Virtue, Julio and Romulette, and Curator?"
"But of course."

Kara at 70. One of life's finer pleasures.

How terribly fuhggin' clumsy of him.

This Kara raid has been a production of Grey Poupon and the Thursday night Free Radicals: Xanyanca, Yldarric, Dranhuntera, Felbane, Skoton, Tavia, Gasket, and The Warrior With No Name.

Run Away Little Girl! Run Away....

Been solo farming Kara lately, hopings fer a pony or mebbe a wriggly dildo but settlings fer 800 gold or so. Is all pretty fuhggin' easy now, 'cept fer when the opera puts on a production of Ladle Rat Rotten Hut. It done get pretty fuhggin' old doin' that fight:
/Shield Slam
/Devastate
/Dev- "Run Away Little Girl!"
Overs and overs and overs and overs and overs. And not evens any shirker cockles afters.

Is good thing I done brought me pumpkin, at least.

Hard To Stop Once Ya Starts

Hey, Unsup, Zeenaa, wanna go see if Mr. Attumen has a pony fer us?

Well, no pony. Zeen, you wanna ask Mr. Moroes if her got a Mongoose for ya?

Yay Mongoose. Let's go see if the Maiden has some hooch and seegars she'll share.

Were one thing after another, and when we was done the big ol' Kara McMansion were cleared again. Picked up two more pieces of Warbringer and a King's Defender. Is a good thing weren't no mages in the party fer ta roll against me fer it. Was so fun gettin' all this retro tanking gear, I went and hopped over ta Shatt and picked up a badger shield ta go with.

Damn, I looks good.

Cheevement Spam

We was a little short handed last week, on accounts of baseball games and critical meetings and Lady Jess' dog feeling peckish and eatin' her authenticator. So instead of suckin' down some more of Mr Grobbulus' Special Brew, we put on our finest and went ta the opera.


Now, Zinzi'd done run Kara back in the day, and I'd done it plenties in me dwarf disguise, but fer most of us it were the first time gettin' past Curator where we'd done got hung up over a year ago. So when we persuaded Prince Melawhateversthefuhg ta take a dirt nap, the cheevement spam did flow copious-like.


Weren't like the old days. Shade, that lazy glubberflugger, went and died before casting Flame Wreath even once, so nobody got ta move and blow up the raid. And Netherspite? "Um, if ya see a beam, go ahead and stand in it" were the strat I gave'em. Chess, though, that were a bitch. Took us three tries fer ta get the hang of it with six buggers. But we did, then went and paid Prince a visit, and that were that.

Is the obligatories money shot:

Four. Teen. Fuhggin. Months.

Yeah, it's been that long since I saved Medivh's scrawny arse out in the swamps and he gave me the key ta this here fixer-upper known as Kara. And tonight, I finallies is gettin' ta use it. Now, I's been buncha times in me dworc disguise, but this were the first time I's goin' as me self. Out in front, tankin' the glubbernuggers. Along withs I had Zinzi what gives good resurrection (the only other Purginista what'd really done the place), Mr. Hoof (who'd done gone once), and Bashabil the little tankadin, Throttle the formaldehyde junkie, Rim what used ta have fireballs set ta "deep fat fry" but he re-specced, and Mog and Ix the DK twins, none of who'd ever been. I even hadda give'em directions ta Deadwind Pass.

We did us a proper job on Attumen and Moroes. The Maiden, now she and I gots a bit of a history together after hours, but tonight we kept things on a professional basis. She put up a heckuva fight, but in the end it were her pretty fanny on the ground. And yeah, me conscience were clear.

We decided fer ta gets all dressed up fer the opera. Yarrrr. It were Oz that night. Much to me and Zinzi's surprise, we took care of Dorothee and her little friends without a single one of us taking a dirt nap, let alone a wipe. Yay us.

We lost Rim the mage before we got ta Curator. He hadda go home and eat some babies or somethin'. That left us with just three dps types, all melee, and they had troubles gettin rid of them pesky Flares. After a coupla wipes, we ended up calling it.

Were a most enjoyable evening, and everyones said they enjoyed the break from Northrend. We may come backs some time, or mebbes another diversion. I hear Onyxia's still out there somewheres, and Don Carlos still has me hat, the bugger.

After Hours in Kara

This happened a while ago, but I didn't talk about it then, 'cause I's talkin' about it now.

We'd finished clearing Karazhan, and everybody else'd hopped a portal back to Shattrath. Me, though, I had this book what the Shade of Aran had been holding, and I needed fer to bring it to this crazy dude in the library. Apparentlies, the mana beasties and robots and whatnots don't mind you hangin' out and reading books and all if yer a freakin' looney. Mebbe they eats batshit brainwaves or sumthin'.

So, thing is, I's lost. Well, mebbe not lost, 'cause I know where I is (the hall where Curator hangs), and I know where the library is (is over there). Is just the part in between what be giving me some difficulties. But I figgers I'll keep pokin' around 'til I works it out. And then I turn the corner and oh bugger!

Is the Maiden of Virtue. What the hey? We done put her arse down several hours ago, and this ain't her territory anywho. Well, I figger I's in fer a beatin' since I ain't got no tank or healers or nuthin'. But she just stops and blinks at me, then starts to wail.

"Ohhhh, nooooooooo! You weren't supposed to be here. You were all supposed to have left! Oh, Prince Mal is going to kiiilllll meeeee!"

"Well, I won't tell him if you won't. Umm, not that I mind, but, uh, aren't you going to attack me?"

"No, I'm off duty now. We go off the clock when we de-spawn. But we're not supposed to let anyone see us then. Ohhh, he's gonna kiillllll meeeee......"

About this time, I noticed a coupla things. First was, she were holding a cigar and a bottle of whiskey, which didn't fit with her usual image. Second was she were starting to cry big water balloon-sized tears. Now, I hates ta see an overgrown woman cry, even if she were one whom I'd been face-smelting just a while ago.

"Now, that doesn't sound so bad. I mean, we killed you earlier. And yet, hear you is, relaxing with whiskey and a smoke..."

"*sniff* It's also a 50 DKP Minus."

"Oh. Ouch"

"Yeah."

And we started talkin'. I told her about how I were really an orc warrior, but I'd started wearin' the magic dwarf disguise when me old guild went kerflubble. She told me what her name were really Clarisse and that the whole Maiden of Virtue gig were just something she were doing ta try ta break into actin'. She shared her JD and I shared some Gurubashi Ganja what I had on me. And eventuallies we found ourselves in one of the guest chambers. I were prepared ta take it slow an gradual, 'til she reminded me what Maiden were just her day job. At which point I pulled out all the stops - after all, it ain't easy fer to satisfy I woman ten times yer size, even when ya is amazingly virile. But I's an orc what rises to the challenge, and before long cries of "Impure thoughts! Profane actions! Yes, yes, YES! Impure! IMPURE! PRO-O-O-O-FAAAAAaaaaaannnne...." were echoing down the empty halls. "Oh, baby, is my conscience ever clear," she told me afters. "You come back next week, I'll cleanse your impurity all night long."

But the next week when we raided Kara again, even though the Maiden of Virtue were there, I coulds tell it weren't Clarisse. Dunno if she got her big acting break, or if Prince busted her fer what we did. Or mebbe she went back ta Indiana, wherevers that be. Anywho, it were a night I won't be forgettin' fer a while.

(oh buggers - I never did get that book back to the nutjob in the library)

Now How My Feet Gonna Fit In THOSE??!?

Aetherial Circle be kinda on a break this month. There just be too many buggers crashing at other buggers homes, too many buggers at them topless beaches in the Bahamamammas, and too many buggers what be sayin' "Screw it! I needs a break from draggin' that scrub Ratter's sorry arse up and down Mount Hyjal!" So, finding 25 adventurers just be too dang much.

So last night some of us went on a badge run in Kara instead. We had a good crew, including our uber "I'll just pull the whole room" tankadin, another dwarfish shadow priest from Team Brigin, merciless slave driver "I needs badges! Get me badges!" Shianti, and a noob huntard what sounded a lot like our Raid Leader. And we rocked the place. Full clear, no wipes, just over three hours. Fer the night at the Opera we got Oz, which I ain't never done before. Burned'em down, easy as you please, and piled in with the corpses we found these Ruby Slippers. Nobody else wanted'em, so I took'em. They might be a good upgrade fer me stamina gear, I ain't sure. I'll have ta check and find out. I can't be bothered ta keep track of the details. Thing of it is, I has trouble enough fittin' me big green feets inta regular dwarf boots. How I's gonna get'em into these little girl slippers, I got no fuhggin' clue.

Ooh, and I got me enough badges fer to go buy me some shiny hand-warmers. Accordings to the list, only kit better done come outta Sunwell, so they should last me a good long time. So I's a happy orc. Even if me toes is feeling mighty pinched...

Going to Kara With The Left Claw

Did sumthin' new this weekend. Instead of goin' on a guild badge run, I hooked up with me blogging friends Jessika and Keredria from the guild The Left Claw. They was a few buggers short this week, and were kind enoughs ta throw me an invite fer one of the slots. Course, K's motives were less than pure - they's already got one shadow priest in they's crew, but them casters, they just cain't get enough of that naughty Vampiric Touching and the Mana! Mana!.

While we was organizing outside the gates, looky who I ran into. Is me friend Squeake, brand new shiny 70th season warrior, getting ready to tank on her first trip to Kara. She's from Team ... uh ... MaryPearl? MarriedEarl? Bugger, I can't be bothered ta remember the details. Anywho. Go go Squeake!


Before long we had our group together, and in we went. And it didn't take me long to bugger up. We get to Attumen's horsie, and I let loose way too fast fer the tank. Horsie says "Tank? I don't see any tanks. I see a SQUISHY!" And then I got a turn to tank it, and, well, you can guess how well that worked out. Note to self: tanks still working on getting Kara gear, no matter how on top of they's game they is, ain't as threatening as ones wearing T5 gear. So I throttled it down a bit and, while I ran a lot closer to the edge than I have before, I's pretty sure I didn't pull aggro again fer the night.

Moroes done were terribly clumsy, the Maiden gave up her Virtue, and the Curator decided what maybe our hall passes was all in order after all. The Big Bad Wolf hates me arse though - once again, he gave me the squealy little girl treatment rightat the start of the fight and nailed me before I made three steps. Note to self: stand far, far back from the wolf next time.


And then we was at Shade. Jess gave us our's orders, and we listened up like good little raiders. And we went in, and we wiped at 30%. And we picked ourselves up, and dusted us offs, and went back in. And wiped at 30% again. And we regrouped, and agreed what this were gonna be the last fight fer the night, win or lose. So in we go, and we burned that crazy dead subberthupper's arse down.

And that were that. Picked up a dozen or so badges, got to know some new folks, and had me a damn fun time. Not a bad way ta spend Saturday night.

Big Pimpin' in Kara

Last Friday were the "bring yer stylin' purple pimp hat" Karazhan run. Us clothies were provided a list of pimpish hats we could go hunt up fer ourselves, but unfortunatlies I were too busy getting my Evoker's Helmet of Second Sight ta have time fer fun. So I's the dweeb in the shot what ain't playin' along. No fun Ratter. Them two on the right what ain't got hats but is wearin' Lovely Red Dresses? Well, we can't all be pimps...

Anywho. See that tasty piece of draenanannieflesh on the left there, lookin' all tribal-like? Is none other then Vonya the Egolicious Priest. We's been friends fer a while now, but this were our first time ta meet all face-ta-face like. So that were pretty cool. And we also had Zasp from Team Ego and Rakzha from Team Squeaky, so it were a pretty blogger-heavy group.

So how'd the run go? Went good. Full clear, 22 badges fer everyone. Coupla wipes, but the first one was a trash pull what all the experts said was a known "if yer really really unlucky it aggros half the room" situation, and we was. And the second were bad luck with were the infernals dropped on our first try at Prince. No insane, totally-unearned dps loots fer me, but I's honored with Violent Eye dudes now, so I gots a purple ring from them, and I cashed in a buncha badeges fer this shiny trinket: Icon of the Silver Crescent.
This be us, getting ready fer to pull Prince. I's in there somewhere, but with so many tall Drananeininnies and Nelfs, it be hard ta see short little me in the back...

Edit for Great Justice: Aensu from Team Ego were also in this run, doing excellent tankings, and I totally missed the connection. Bad Ratter. So, even more bloggy goodness in this run!

So I Went To Kara, And All I Got Was A Lousy T-Shirt

And um, oh yeah. Six epics and twenty-two badges of justice.

So it's friday night. I show up on time. I've got buff food, several stacks of water, a buncha sacred candles fer the prayer of fort. And I'm wearing mostly greens and a few blues from Hellfire and Nagrand. So it be fair to say what my arse is getting carried.

Biggest concern going in was that I'd do sumthin' ignorant and wipe the raid. This did not happen. I did pull a few ignorants, and there were a few wipes, but not at the same time. But overall I thinks I did okay. Did me shackle assignments as I were supposed to, kept Vampiric Touch and SW:P up on the boss fights, and had the sense to heal meself when the holy priest were busy. Need to understand some of the boss fights better, but that'll come with experience. Me dps were the sucks early on, but it definitelies got higher as the night went on, and when I gets me gear gemmed and enchanted and whatnot it'll be higher still.

So what I get? Lessee...
Handwraps of Flowing Thought
Boots of the Infernal Coven
Trial Fire Trousers
Ritssyn's Lost Pendant
Staff of Infinite Mysteries
Signet of Unshakable Faith

Mostly dps gear, so I thinks I'll be sticking with the shadow at least until I can get some more healy epics tailored up.

And along the way, I had me a blast. Big thanks to me guildies what made the night possible, and I's looking forward to going back this week.

Number the Three

Well, we did it. We went back in time and protected Medivh while he opened the Dark Portal. Here you can see that the portal is open and the first orcish troops is checking it out. See that one on the left? I think he's me dad's uncle.

I tell ya, it were a hell of a fight. Not 'cause me guildies ain't awesome, 'cause they is, but it weren't really our kind of fight. We had me, and Zinzi who gives way wicked healing, and our two survivalist hunters Bull and Aelion what can lay traps like nobody's business. And Throttle, who totally rocks at being sneaky. They's so awesome at crowd control that sometimes I need to remind'em to leave somebody for me to fight. But this weren't a crowd control fight. This were a lay down the law, take no prisoners, maximum overdrive dps fight. And it were hard going for a while there. But we rallied and pulled together and got the muggerflumpin job done. And I got some high-end loots out of it, but I'll talk about that another time.

So what does this mean? Means there's gonna be decades of wars, famines, exterminations, concentration camps, Thrall gets to boink Jaina Proodmore, legions of undead, and I get to grow up in the deserts of Durotar. There's reasons why this is all a good thing, but I can't be bothered to remember the details.

What's more important is what it means for me, in the here and now. You sees, after we'd killed all the evil time dragons and the Portal was good and open, I goes and talks to Medivh. And I shows him the key what Khadgar had put together from the pieces I'd pulled outta Shadow Lab and Steamvault and Arcatraz. And he was all "Dude. The fuhg you get this?" Then he takes that key and gives me one what looks just like it but apparently is charged up or something and tells me to go talk to Khadgar again. So back I goes to Shattrath and shows it to K and he says "Ratter you are good to go. Waltz yerself over to Karazhan and get yerself a buttload of purples!" Well, okay, he didn't really say that. But he did say that the key to Karazhan is really and truly mine, and I shoulds go use it.

So here it be. The key to the great tower of Karazhan. Don't look like much, do it? But it could unlock the next phase of me life, so I figure it's pretty darn important. Now I just gots to find a crew to go in there with me. I knows Zinzi and Aelion'd be up for it, 'cause they's troopers and got some righteous gear, but it don't look like anyone else in our tiny uber-casual guild is gonna come with us. So I don't know what I'm gonna do. But I'll worry about that tomorrows. Fer now, I's just gonna scratch Goal and Priority Number the Three off me list, and that's good enough.