She were fifty tall and weighed a thousand tons. Leader of her people, founder of her race. She were worshipified throughout the realm of Deepholm. She were so fabulously wealthy with diamonds and rubies and other gems what I ain't even heard of that she didn't even bothers ta notice'em. She were Therazane, the Stonemother.
And me? I were just a simple orc from Durotar. But when our eyes met, I could tell....
She wanted me. She wanted me bad.
Who was I fer ta deny her?
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15 comments:
That is sooooo wrong. Even Orcs have standards...right?!
Had me laughing in my office chair. Thanks Ratters!
Zwingli
Maybe its time to settle down with a nice sugar momma.
Sometimes you really scare me...
Gotta be honest. I'd heard about ol' Therazane since, heck, back when we were just fledgling adventurers. And all this time I was expecting her to have, y'know... legs.
Who knew?
The big question being is she just another notch in Ratter's, um, "axe" or is this going to be a regular hook-up?
And you never know, maybe she's like Big Bertha of the GLA...
You my friend are a braver man than I.
Eeew.
Also, eeeew.
And, having given this some serious and careful consideration:
Eeeeew.
I'm glad they've created an unattractive female character with a nonstandard body type who isn't evil. Well done.
On further, further thought.
How exactly would the practicalities of this work? The size differential must be challenging. And her on top would be, well, brief..
@Stop She does have legs, but she's got a Baron Harkonnen thing going on where they are pretty much useless for supporting her weight, so she just kinda floats.
Now this is late, but you are soo incredibly right, Rat. A model based on old fertility godesses? We all know where that is going to lead...
In reply to Koch:
A woman of stone. An orc of steel. One night of love.
Sunday! Sunday! Sunday! Straight from Therazane's thighs to you: Ratters mini pets! Own a piece of the action that toppled the World Pillar!
Yes, I hear chicks dig it when you kill their daughters.
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