Sunday, June 29, 2008

Is Where Ellspeth Meets Hogger

Hello everyone! This is Ellspeth, the pretty warlock from Team Ratshag. The other day my bff Suptail was admiring the festival outfit Alayda had picked up, so I said why don't we go honor some flames ourselves? I suggested to the Festival Talespinner that we could really honor the flames if we used them to set the nearby tents on fire, and maybe I could Immolate some of the celebrants, but she said, no, that wasn't necessary.

We ran all over Azeroth, honoring Horde fires and putting out Alliance ones, and picking up flight paths. Look! It's Karazhan! Ratters tells me it's full of lost souls and wandering spirits and other tormented types. And they put on an opera performance every week, and you get to kill the actors. It all sounds so exciting!

So, we had just put out the fire in Goldshire when we saw these little human kids running by, enjoying the summer day without a care in the world. And they were so beautiful and innocent I just had to suck one of their souls out through the eye sockets, to add to my collection of favorites. But Suptail said no, we had to get their parents' permission first. Phooey!

Well, to work off some frustration I went and found Hogger, and started smacking that gnoll up one side of the head and down the other with my staff. And then I felt a lot better.

And before too long we each had one-hundred burning blossoms to turn in. And we each got our rainment. There was a mix-up at first, where I got hers by mistake and when I put it on it was hanging way to low and you could see everything, and this troll teenager started to point and laugh at me. So I shadowbolted him a few times, and then he stopped. And Suptail and I switched outfits, and everything fit much better.

Don't we look HOT?


Friday, June 27, 2008

Is From the Brain of Joss Whedon

Teaser from Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog on Vimeo.

BA Chatroom Sillies

[11:12] Leafy: OK. Do I want to scroll back up to find out who is sexual-preformance challenged?
[11:12] Ratshag: is not me
[11:12] TJ: that's what SHE said!
[11:12] TJ: .... wait
[11:13] TJ: I think I messed that line up.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Is Where Phoenicia Shows Off Her New Outfit to Arugal

'Allo there! This is Phoenicia, with another story of mah adventures with the Eternal Covenant.

The Boss knew I was going to be tanking tonight, so he sent me some new armor. "Grunt's Legguards of the Moonkey, with Clefthide Leg Armor." Well, ah put them on, and I said to mahself, this must be some sorta joke. Ah mean, the name alone is in poor taste, but how're t'ese skimpy t'ings gonna protect mah legs? Ah, well. It's a good thing I've got such lovely legs, for I probably won't replace these until I can wear plate!

Ooh-hoo-hwah! Ooh-hoo-hwah-hah!

We only had four of us last night: Xan the hunter, Babbit the wee mage, Rhanne the druid, and mahself. We'd heard rumors of bad goings on over in Shadowfang Keep, though, and since apparently the Whordies weren't able ta handle t'emselves we figured we'd best go see to it ourselves.

And see to it we did. Even though we were short-handed, we cleared the place out in just over two hours. With Rhanne on healing, we didn't even have a serious injury, let alone a death. And everboody got at least one blue item. Mahself, I picked up the Commander's Crest shield, and the Butcher's Slicer. Afterwards, we went back ta Southshore and had a few pints, and I found mahself a pleasant diversion. But since I'm not certain members of this blog, I dinna kiss and tell - you'll just have ta use yuir imagination!

And since I've passed mah 20th season, I've been trained in dual-wielding. I guess this week I'm more of a mace-and-sword loving dwarf chick. Ooh-hoo-hwah! Ooh-hoo-hwah-hah!

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Is Where Galertruby Gets an Avatar

Garhhl. Gahhl galha Garrrahhalagh.

Glallh. Aghla gallagh lalgall ghahalla. Lghalahl gah gahghla agglha. Gahall glahl aggha laghl, glah agh gahlaghahall glagghah aghagl. Gahhll garhh ahhghr glahh gallagh, agh grrhal gallha gra gahhllha gallraghl ahl galagh!

Allgahal glah gagghla!

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Is Where Alayda Gets Fired Up

'ello mon! This be Alayda, da Team's shaman. I'm still living wit' dat silly girl DangerMouse, keeping her supplied with leather and metals so she can make her gear, and helpin' her find her daggers so she can go do dat killin' in de Gulch. And in return I help her eat dem cookies she likes ta bake. Mon, she put some serious mojo into dem, dey's amazingly delicious. You take it from Alayda, chile, ain't nobody bakes like da Mouse. And lately we had us a guest, dat druid Palintera. I know, mon, she's an elf and we're supposed to be "For da Horde" and all, but da poor girl be having romance problems and needed to get away from it for a bit. I offered to go get her her a love potion from da witch doctor, straighten everything up right quick, but she said no, she wanted to solve it her way. Elves, mon, what ya gonna do? You got one more week dere, Pali, den I gonna throw you into da stewpot!


Well, mon, dis here be da Midsummer Festival, and I do like to get festive. So I been travelling around, honoring da fires of da Horde, and putting out da fires of da Alliance. Some folks ask, how do you put out a bonfire so fast? Well, I'm a shaman - I just throw down my water totem. How you do it mon is between you and whatever water you carrying. ;)

But first, mon, I buff up at da ribbon pole in Orgrimmar before I head out, just to get into da spirit.

Now, dere ain't too many Alliance fires easy for a shaman in her 23rd season to get to. But I put on my ghost wolf form and started running south from Hammerfall. I hit da ones by Menethil, Thelsamar, and Kharanos. Dem dwarf guards, dey didn't like me runnin' t'rough their tunnels, mon, but I'm just too damn fast for dem to catch!

After I put out the fire in Kharanar, I paused to dance wit' de fire keeper dere, to show I meant no real harm. Dat lasted a couple of minutes, til a guard showed up and chased me off again.

But back in Orgrimmar, I turned in my burning blossoms for a Vestment of Summer dress. Mon, I love how it makes my hands flame up when I dance! I feel real close to da fire spirits, I tell you.

So, dat's what I've been up to. Spirits be wit' you, mon!

Monday, June 23, 2008

Anethewhatsit's Arse Goes DOWN

Two percent ...
One percent ...
And Anethefugger, the second boss of Mount Hyjal, is Down! Is a guild first! Yay us!As promised, I danced on the dunkerblugger's corpse. Well, such as it were. We pulled these nifty shoulders outta the wreckage, and guess who won the bidding? Well, is me blog, ya think I'd bring'em up if I hadn't? Once I get'em gemmed and enchanted, these puppies'll be worth breaking me Shadow's Embrace set for. So it were a damn fine moment.

Then we decided to move on to the next fight, and great googly moogly did it go crazy after that. Jaina's gonna teleport us. Oh bugger, she just teleported herself and here come a bajillion undeaders. Run! Crap! Which way?

Well, we eventually found our way to the Horde camp, with only a few unlucky buggers having they's still-living flesh gnawed of they's bones. Next time, they'll get in gear sooners. Once there, me and Thrall took a minute fer a man-to-man talk.

And then it were time to fight the incoming waves again, and whoa nellie did our tactics break down. Ghouls here, Gargoyles there, freakin' Frost Dragon up aboves, folks runnin' around not knowin' what ta target, Thrall layin' some serious pain on any fumperthudder dumb enough to get close...

It were a complete pandemonification, and a helluva fun time. We managed to hold out before eventually gettin' buried under the seventh wave. But we'll be goin' back next week, and we'll see if Mister Drain-yer-Mana Make-You-Go-Boom Kaz'rogaine feels like handing over me pants.

The Seven Words Ya Cain't Say When Blogging

Shizz, whizz, fuhg, cunny, bogmugger, glumperdugger, and bewbs.

Bye George. Gonna miss ya.

Friday, June 20, 2008

Mounts at the 30th Season?

Heh. I remembers being in my 29th season as a dworc, and how fuhggin' tired me feet were, with no relief on sight. Sparin' me younger teammates some of that? Sounds good ta me.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Is Where Galertruby Rocks Out

Been a growing trend in the WoW Blogosphere of you buggers rewritings the lyrics ta some songs fer to make'em more relevant to us adventurers. And we here at Team Ratshag is really appreciative of yer efforts and yer creativities. And we figgers we owes it to the community to reciper... ressipro... recessicip... bugger it. We's gonna give ya a song of our own.

Now me, I sings pretty good, but I ain't the best fer making up new words. Is hard enough learning the real ones, ya know. But young Galertruby is a hardworking, creative lad, and he done come up with a song of his own. Is to the tune of ... ummm .... huh. Fuhggit. You buggers just pick a tune what seems ta fit, I figger that'll be close enough.

Ghlahrg algha agglag gahahr
Lagghal aggahr galahhla.
Ghagglha gaharrgh glha agglahg
Allhagla gahrl glallgahagl lahgl.

Aghlahhl glarrh ghalrlhh alhhrga
Gallhr glah garrahhalglar
Agrhh glagglha gha ghrallhalha
Aglh aglha gallh gahll gahrrallah.

Agglh ahghlagla agh grrhal
Gallha gra gahhllha gallraghl ahl
Galagh gahhll garhh ahhghr glahh
Gallagh aghala aggrh lahllaglharl gha.

Aghlahhl glarrh ghalrlhh alhhrga
Gallhr glah garrahhalglar
Agrhh glagglha gha ghrallhalha
Aglh aglha gallh gahll gahrrallah.

Gagglha aghrl glahl!

(Is a drum solo here)

Aghlahhl glarrh ghalrlhh alhhrga
Gallhr glah garrahhalglar
Agrhh glagglha gha ghrallhalha
Aglh aglha gallh gahll gahrrallah.

Glhagl gllha ahhr glahhlglhaarhga
Ghallah allhag gllha garrharlh!
Aglhha gahllragl gllah aghhrla
Gahhllrah gah glaghhlh glahh!

Gahhl aghhr garahhghlahhrgh aghraahl glhahhl gahhlah, glah aghr ghrallhahl, gha gahrrlagahr agh, gahlagh agghlagh garrh. Arhhlagh gahl grah glahhghl.


Everybody Likes The Naughty Touching

This conversation on Mount Hyjal sounded strangely familiar...Unfortunatelies, that dufferbunker Anethewhosit survived. Again. Gonna dance on his corpse when we do put that bugger down.

Monday, June 16, 2008

I Is Me Own Worst Enemy

So, I's looking at the WWS report from last night's SSC run, and I notices what the single biggest source of damage into me, by a big fuhggin margin, were Shadow Word: Death, cast by ... ummm ... Ratshag. Way ahead of watery graves, spitfire totems, and various other random attacks and AoEs. Is big thanks to Kara, Saf, Drak, Xian, and all them other healers what helped keep me from killing meself.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Going to Kara With The Left Claw

Did sumthin' new this weekend. Instead of goin' on a guild badge run, I hooked up with me blogging friends Jessika and Keredria from the guild The Left Claw. They was a few buggers short this week, and were kind enoughs ta throw me an invite fer one of the slots. Course, K's motives were less than pure - they's already got one shadow priest in they's crew, but them casters, they just cain't get enough of that naughty Vampiric Touching and the Mana! Mana!.

While we was organizing outside the gates, looky who I ran into. Is me friend Squeake, brand new shiny 70th season warrior, getting ready to tank on her first trip to Kara. She's from Team ... uh ... MaryPearl? MarriedEarl? Bugger, I can't be bothered ta remember the details. Anywho. Go go Squeake!

Before long we had our group together, and in we went. And it didn't take me long to bugger up. We get to Attumen's horsie, and I let loose way too fast fer the tank. Horsie says "Tank? I don't see any tanks. I see a SQUISHY!" And then I got a turn to tank it, and, well, you can guess how well that worked out. Note to self: tanks still working on getting Kara gear, no matter how on top of they's game they is, ain't as threatening as ones wearing T5 gear. So I throttled it down a bit and, while I ran a lot closer to the edge than I have before, I's pretty sure I didn't pull aggro again fer the night.

Moroes done were terribly clumsy, the Maiden gave up her Virtue, and the Curator decided what maybe our hall passes was all in order after all. The Big Bad Wolf hates me arse though - once again, he gave me the squealy little girl treatment rightat the start of the fight and nailed me before I made three steps. Note to self: stand far, far back from the wolf next time.

And then we was at Shade. Jess gave us our's orders, and we listened up like good little raiders. And we went in, and we wiped at 30%. And we picked ourselves up, and dusted us offs, and went back in. And wiped at 30% again. And we regrouped, and agreed what this were gonna be the last fight fer the night, win or lose. So in we go, and we burned that crazy dead subberthupper's arse down.

And that were that. Picked up a dozen or so badges, got to know some new folks, and had me a damn fun time. Not a bad way ta spend Saturday night.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Guest Blogger: Axe-Loving Dwarf Chick

Helloo there!

Meh name is Phoenicia, and I are the newest member of Team Ratshag. I are also a member of the Eternal Covenant, which is the Alliance affiliate of Mister Rat's first guild, The Purge. We have a number o' new member od in the guild, and it is a verry exciting time, I tell ya.

Since many o' these new guildies are Night Elves and Draenei (or headbangers, as I call them, since they bang their heads on proper ceilings) I decided to begin my adventures by running to Azuremyst. That was an exciting journey, I can tell ya! But I made it, with only a few scars, and Mister Rat always says that scars just increase a warrior's sex appeal.

Once I got there, I met up with my new guildmates. We have not one, not two, but three druids - Susurra, Rhanne, and Emetib. There's also a trigger-happy hunter named Xanyanca, Ortelianu the shammy, and wee little Baggit the Mage. But as a tank, I are most excited with our healer, a priest named Huoculon. And while I cannae pronounce that, I will say that he are a sexy devil, with horns and tail and necktacles. And one of these days I are going to find out what he are a-wearing under that dress of his!

We started off killing the badies on the Isles of Azuremyst and Bloodmyst. But we soon felt ready for a more serious challenge, and set our eyes upon that clan of druids gone bad in Wailing Caverns. So we've been working our way through it, building our skills, knocking the rust off of the old guild, and having ourselves a jolly good time.
I've been enjoying tanking these mobs. Mister Rat taught me well, and I are doing him proud. There have been some three-pulls, and even when we don't have Baggit with us for crowd control, I are holding aggro like a rock. Well, except for when some of the headbangers get too excited and start attacking while I are still trying to pull them back ta where I want them. But we've been working on that one.
We have been obtaining some very useful items in the Caverns. So far I have picked up the Stinging Viper mace, Kresh's Back for a shield, and the Sporid Cape. I think we are close to having it fully cleared, which will be a nice accomplishment.

Well, that is my tale, so far. Thank ye for stopping by, and keep yuir feet on the ground!

(Mister Rat just asked me to add that we have established that I can drink all of meh guildies under the table. Even Ortelianu. He was verry proud of that.)

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Don't Stand in the FUHGGIN' WHIRLWIND!

First rule of raiding: Don't stand in the whatever. Fire, Death & Decay, them holes Netherspite puts out, you name it. So what do I do on my first Leotheras the Blind fight? I stand too close when he does his first whirlwind move and I get nailed 30 seconds into the fight. Okay. Lesson learned: when he goes whirlwind, run far, far away. Find a corner and get in it, as far as me stumpy legs'll take me. Luckies fer me, it were a wipe and we hadda try again. This time, I get way clear while he does his whirligig all over the fuckermutherin' room, and all is lovely. I do me damage when the RL says to, I stops when he says to. I even hadda confront me Inner Demon: Since us orc warriors is such simple and and noble creatures, I figgers our inner demons is pretty mild buggers compared to thems what always be havin' to suppress they's feelings and look virtuous, like paladins and nelfs. 'Cause me Inner Demon? I dropped his arse like a sack of rotten potatoes. Or maybe it were like a pile of bricks. Whatevers. I can't be bothered ta keep track of the details.
And soon enough Leo hisself were a squashed identity crisis. He had two T5 Defender Glove Tokens, but T5 gloves ain't that good fer spriesties, so while I bid on them, I dropped out pretty early and they went to a coupla droods. Wanta save up fer something I really can use, ya know?

So that were Leo. We'd also done fer Hydros and Lurker, but I ain't talkin' 'bout them today. Now I get a few days off, hopefully I can scrounge up mats fer to Spellpower up me bracers. And mebbe help Pali track down her missing friend. Not sure what's up with them two, but Pali's been running all over Azeroth, all frantic-like.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Mana! Mana!

Not that I's complaining er nuthin'.

(Is thanks to Phae fer sending me the linkie)

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Getting Schooled on Mount Hyjal

So there I is in the Caverns of Time. Apparentlies, somebodies been monkeying with history again, and they need a buncha suckers adventurers to stop the demons from doing... ummm ... bugger it. Stop'em from doing something. Otherwise, the Legion wins the Third War, millions perish, and Thrall and Jaina don't get to get they's post-battle victory freak on.

First up were a whole lotta undeads and abominations and those big nasty spider things, coming in waves. And we burned them down just fine. Then came Rage Winterchill, a I'm-dead-but-not-really Itch dude. I got caught in one of his ice blocks, but me pvp trinket popped me outta it just fine. But then I got me first lesson of the night. I were expecting his "death and decay" move to be one of them patches of death things, where you gotta step out of it and yer fine. And I thought that were what I was seeing on the ground, so I sorta shifted a bit and kept firing. Wrong. The whole area were affected, and I shoulda just hauled me hairy arse outta there. Dead priest. Fortunatelies, the raid were able to carry on withouts me. Dead Itch.

Then we spent a lot of time explaining a strategy fer the next boss. It were rather complex and confusicating, and not just fer a simple orc like me. But we all did our best to understands, and so the RL tells Jaina we's ready to go. And here came more waves of undead, and undead spiders, and big buggers made of deader parts stitched together. And we got them down too. Then big ole "I can summon infernals" Anethewhosit showed up. And I'm busy trying to do me job of shuttling between hitting him and burning down infernals what I miss that the next infernal were gonna drop on me, until there it were. I started running fer the tank, but I were too late and the gubberchudder two-shotted me. Lesson learned: be more alert fer incoming infernals. This time things fell apart pretty fast, and it were a wipe. Lesson learned: have a simpler plan.

We try again, and this time something went wrong on one of the last waves of trash. Apparently everything hit the pally tank at the same time, and he went down faster than a Booty Bay whore. And then the abominations performed abominations upon the ranged dps, and it were a wipe.

Third try. A few adjustments, and we take out the trash waves easy as you like. Then Anesthetist drops in, and we go to work on him. Much simpler plant this time, and it's working a lot better. Except I got lucky and managed to get back-to-back carrion swarms from him real early in the fight, and while I tried to heal meself after the first one, the debuff pretty seriously nerfed that. And that were all she wrote fer this priestie. So I lay there being dead while the guild beat him down to 19%, before being overwhelmed by a sea of infernals. Lesson learned? Not sure. More stamina gear? Hold off on popping a healthstone and potting until the 15-second debuff wears off? Don't be so damn unlucky, that's fer certain.

So that were me night. I feel pretty good about what I learned, and I think we got a good system down. Little more practice, and I thinks we can take the bugger down.

Monday, June 9, 2008

Has Anyone Seen Feralicious?

Because, you see, I really, really gotta talk to her. Because, well - No! No time time to explain. I'll tell you all of it later. Right now, I just need to find her. Oh my goddess, where can she be?

Gear Check

Is needing to do a check here, help me figger out what upgrades to look fer, all that. Is mainly fer me, so feels free ta skip if ya don't care. These is all based on rankings at, although I done left a few items out cause of pfffft! ain't gonna happen. Also, assumes goal is max spell damage - fer some fights is needed to exchange damage fer stamina, but I ain't talkings 'bout that here.

Current Head: Evoker's Helmet of Second Sight
Upgrade: Lots of possibilities here. Several drops from Kara (inc T4), SSC (T5), TK, and ZA, crafted ones like Spellstrike Hood, even the S1 hat would be an upgrade (mainlies fer the Stamina though).
Best pre-T6 option: Hood of Hexing (ZA)

Current Neck: Ritssyn's Lost Pendant
Upgrade: Vindicator's Pendant of Subjugation (PvP reward)
Best pre-T6 option: Brooch of Nature's Mercy (ZA) Yeah, is healy gear, but haste rocks

Current Shoulders: Frozen Shadoweave Shoulders
No pre-T6 upgrades

Current Back: Ruby Drape of the Mysticant
Upgrades: Shadow-Cloak of Dalaran (Moroes), Cloak of Arcane Alacrity (60 Badges)
Best pre-T6 option: Royal Cloak of the Sunstriders (TK - Kael'thas)

Current Chest: Frozen Shadoweave Robe
Only pre-T6 upgrade: Vestments of the Sea-Witch (SSC - Vashj)

Current Wrist: Runed Spell-cuffs
No pre-T6 upgrades

Current Gloves: Handwraps of Flowing Thought
Upgrades: Soul-Eater's Handwraps (Magtheridon), badge gear
best pre-T6 option: Studious Handwraps (60 Badges)

Current Waist: Belt of Blasting
No pre-T6 upgrades

Current Legs: Trousers of the Astromancer
Upgrades: Leggings of the Seventh Circle (Doom Lord Kazzak), badge gear
Best pre-T6 option: Pantaloons of Arcane Annihilation (75 badges)

Current Feet: Frozen Shadoweave Boots
No pre-T6 upgrades

Current Rings: Violet Signet, Band of Crimson Fury
Upgrades: many
Best practical pre-T6 option: Signet of Ancient Magics (ZA)

Current Trinkets: Glowing Crystal Insignia, Icon of the Silver Crescent
Upgrade: Darkmoon Card: Crusader
Best pre-T6 option: Hex Shrunken Head

Current Weapon: Staff of Infinite Mysteries
Upgrades: drops in Kara, ZA, Heroic MrT, badge gear
Best pre-T6 option: Scryer's Blade of Focus (150 badges) and Fetish of the Primal Gods (35 badges)

Ain't This Cool?

Is big thanks to Bansidhe fer puttin' doing up another sig fer me. Looks way, way cool on the AC boards.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Naughty Touching

So, what do a shadow priest to the table? We got no AoE attacks, most of our attacks is DoTs or channeleds so they can't crit, and our only real crowd control spell be Shackle, what only works on mobs to stupids to realize they's dead. Even then, it don't work on them annoying Fersaken rogues in battlegrounds. /humph And ya, we gots Psychic Scream, but it's usually best we leave fearing to the experts.

One thing what we does have though is Vampiric Touch. This damage over time bugger also restores mana to everbodies in me party, at a rate of 5% of the the damage I does, as long as it be running. Now it lasts only 15 seconds, and takes 1 and a halfs to cast, so it do cut into me time fer throwing higher powered attacks. And it ain't like infinite or nothing. But still, when yer raiding, every little bit helps.

Now, is kinda hard fer me to tell how much difference it makes, since I's always used it. But I did listen in on one of our holy priesties the other night, ta see what that touching action were doing fer her:
"Yes! baby! Fill my mana pool! Just like that, Baby! Don't stop! DONT EVER STOP! YES! YES! YES! YEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!!"

(Is concealing her identity outta privacy respects.)

So, there ya has it. One of the benefits of havings a shadow priest along when ya go offs ta kill big bad bosses.

Friday, June 6, 2008

Is Where Palintera Has Something To Share

Ishnu-alah. I appreciate the advice everyone offered, and I especially appreciate Bellwether putting up with my mom calling her every ten minutes asking if she knew where I was. And I'm going to talk to Feral real soon, I promise, and hopefully we can ... umm ... uh ... make it bettter, I guess. I hope. So, I'm going to talk to her real soon. Just, not yet. But soon. I promise.

But, meanwhile, I ran across this story about another young druid that I found pretty inspirational, and I wanted to share with you. It sounds like she's having some great adventures, at least when she can get away with it.

And, I'm really going to go talk with Feral. Really, really soon. As soon as I figure out what to say...


TJ Needs Assistance

Go assist.

Some Mistells Is More Tellin' Than Others

They is nice pants, but I's still gettin' used to the zipper bein' in the back.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Throttle Is Lurking

I can feel his eyes on me.

Or mebbe it's Zinzi.

Wait, Where We Going?

I hates not being prepared. I really does. So I was set fer last night's run at Lady the Skanky Ho Vashj. Had me Flasks of Pure Death, me Super-Duper Wizard Oil fer to keep me shaft greased, me Cajun-style Basilisk Nuggets. And I'd gone back and reviewed what'd gone down last week, so's I could learn and be more effective this time around.

Except, no, wait. Change of plans, due to who's coming and who ain't. Issues with Red-Winged Penguins or sumthin'. Anywho, we's gonna go fer everybody in SSC what ain't Her Fishiness. Bugger. That's three bosses what I ain't never seen before, and I only gots a few hours ta learn about 'em. Quick- read the strats. Watch a couple videos. Do what I cans ta prepare.

No, no, no wait. We ain't a coupla the key duggermunkers what be needed fer some of them SSC bosses. So we're going to Tempest Keep. Right now. Oh, bugger. I don't know nuthin's about these fights. Shoot, I ain't even got the freakin' flight path. Oh wells. Gots to do me best, listen to instructions, keep me eyes open. Don't stand in the flames. All that good stuff.

So. Quick rundown of what I saw:

Miss Solarian, there, she's one of them "easy, but if you don't do the right thing at the right time, you wipe the raid" fights. No pressure or nuthin'. And of course, when the time came fer me to run away, I goes the wrong way and nearly wipes the raid. Realized I'd buggered it when I hear Cay squeaking "Oh, no, no, no, no ..." Fortunatelies, it weren't as bad as it coulda been, it didn't 'cause a wipe, and everyones had a good laugh at me after. Which were fair. But I's gonna have to do some studying on this so's I learn what I should do better next time.

After it were over, some of the loot what turned up were the lady's trousers, which were kinda weird, considerings how she'd done transmogrified inta a voidwalker, what ain't got no legs. But there they was, a small but definite upgrade fer me. So I put in a minimum bid (which were still half of me DKP accumulation), and since nobody else were wanting them I gots. Wewt.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

My Precious

So, the other day, I says to meself, "Self, is time you learned ta fish as a dwarf. Yeah, I know, is time-consuming and yer still scrambling ta get yer gear caught up to the levels it needs ta be fer where yer runnin'. Howevers, it will eventually pay fer itself, when ya can do the dailies and catch motes of water and all that."

"Yeah, yer right," I says, so I in between AV battles I goes ta Stormwind and talks to the trainer. And I buys a pole and a shiny bauble. And I starts fishing. And I's caught mebbe twenty fish or so. And then I reels in and there ain't no fish on the line. I curses a bit and prepares to cast again, when I sees something small and shiny caught on the hook. I takes a closer look.

The 1 Ring. And it was mine, all mine. My Precious. I could see my destiny before me. I would use its power to unite the factions, and cast down Sargeras and Arthas and all their minions. And I would rule all of Azeroth and Outland in an era of peace and prosperity and the people would all be my peons, motivated to work through gentle application of the booterang. All would love me and despair!

Eh, bugger that. I trotted me stumpy little dwarf legs over to the auction house, and within a few hours got a 115 gp fer it. Not bad for a fer minutes fishing.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

They Got They's Nether in a Twist

Fimlys and Bre been working hard on a interestings project. Is a blogglecasty, er sumthin' like that. I can't be bothered to keep track of the details. Anywho, is called Twisted Nether, and I's finding it to be rather interestings. They talks about news and interviews buggers and other interestings, and ya can downloads it and everythings. So go checks it out, and be sure ta ask about the million dollar giveaway they's got going.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Is Where Palintera Has A Tough Night

Oh. Umm, hi. Uh ... Goddess watch over you. I guess.

You're probably wondering what I'm doing, walking along the Terrace of Light so early in the morning. Well, I really didn't want to go home last night. Wasn't even sure what "home" meant, to be honest. So I've been walking, and thinking, and trying to figure out how I screwed up so bad.

It all started yesterday, when Feral and I were killing Murlocs over on Bloodmyst Isle, when we ran into this hunter named Teej, who was on the same quest chain. And so we did the polite thing and invited her to join us. Which was great, 'cause the three of us were able to really rip through things quickly. And we pretty quickly finished off every job there was to do there and took the boat over to Darkshore to see what we could find in the way of work there.

And it was then that things kinda, well, changed. The two of them started exchanging looks, and telling each other jokes, and it seemed to me like they were flirting with each other. At least, Feral was flirting with Teej. At first, I tried to tell myself it was no big deal. But it sure felt like a big deal to me. I mean, sure, she's pretty and all, but I'm the one whose been with Feral all this time. I thought that meant something. But I felt left out, and not noticed, and not wanted anymore. And so when we got to Astraanar I said "I think you two have everything under control, so I'm just gonna leave you to it." And then I hearthed out of there, as quick as I could.

Once in Shattrath, I wandered down to the World's End Tavern. I'd never gone down to Lower City by myself, before, but I figured I could I handle myself - it's not like I'm a kid anymore. There was some sort of party going on at the WET. You see, there was this ogre named Rulik, and every ten minutes or so some adventurers would come in and demand that he give them the money he owed, well, someone else. And he'd tell them to get lost, only using really bad language. And then they'd attack him and kill him and take his money. And the patrons of the bar would cheer, and after the adventurers had left, someone would resurrect the poor fellow, and someone else would hand him a new bag of gold. And he'd go back to drinking until the next band of adventurers came in. Apparently, there was betting on if the next group would be Horde or Alliance, and other things, and the gold was his cut from the pot. I considered placing a few bets, but I just wasn't in the mood. Although I did take a turn at resurrecting him.

So there I was, sitting at the bar, feeling pretty lonely and dejected and rejected. When the guy next to me offers to buy my next drink. He was polite about it, and I was getting a little low on cash, so I said, "Sure, why not."

Turned out his name was Dovid, and he was travelling from Stormwind on business. And he had the most beautiful, deep brown eyes, and something about him just made me trust him. He was so polite and sympathetic and understanding as I told him about Feral and me, and how good it had been, but now I wasn't sure anymore and- and- and maybe she'd found someone new. Someone more interesting. And now I jus- jus- just know what I was going to do. And he listened, and helped me calm down a bit, then he suggested that being in a tavern wasn't really the best place to really sort things through. But he knew a place where I could go and get some rest and he had some friends there who might be able to help me figure out what I wanted to do next. And I was so grateful for him taking the time to talk to some silly upset girl he'd just met, and being willing to help me out. And so we were just getting ready to leave ...
... when an orc walked into the tavern. A big fellow, a warrior, carrying axes and swords and wearing mismatched but very serious looking armor. And he walked up to the bar next to Dovid and dropped his helm on it with a very heavy thud and a swirl of green, demonic smoke. And I couldn't help it. I just didn't want Mister Shag to see me being all weak and confused, instead of strong and forceful like a member of his team is supposed to be. So I shadowmelded. I didn't know what else to do!

But he wasn't looking at me. He was looking at my new friend. "Hello, Dovid," he said in his deep rumbly voice. "Been hearing stories about you."

"I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about, Ratshag," he replied.

"Way I hear it, you been working fer that duggerflumpin Broken, Alekko the Pimp. Hear you's been rounding up fresh young faces to put to work in his houses. And I hears what there's some what'd pay to see that operation put down."

"Is that so?" And suddenly there was knife in Dovid's hand, and he plunged it into Mister Shag's stomach, between two plates of his hauberk. I might have shrieked at that, I'm not sure, but Mister Shag just calmly looked down at the hilt protruding out, and then back up at David's face.

"I didn't say there was a price on yer head, yet, ya stoopid bugger. Was gonna gives ya a friendly warning, is all. But since ya wants to play, well..."

He reached for Dovid with his right hand, moving fast. But Dovid was faster and easily dodged out of the way. And then Mister Shag's left hand seized Dovid's throat and pushed him to the ground, completely overpowering him. I didn't think it was possible for anyone to move that fast. Dovid squirmed a bit, but it was clear that the grip holding him was far too strong to break. It was also clear that he couldn't breathe.

"Here's the deal, fubbergunker. You go. Now. I ever see you again, yer gonna haveta deal with the axe. Blink twice if ya understands."

Dovid blinked twice. The armored fist pinning him down let go, and he rolled over, gasping for air. Then he half-crawled, half-stumbled out of the tavern and disappeared into the night.

"Kid, ya wanna do that Healing Touch thing? Ain't good to drink whiskey with an open gut wound."

Oh. Right. I should do that. I unmelded, and cast HT. And again. And again. And again. Goddess, the wound was deep. If it'd been me, I'd've been dead. And then, not knowing what else to do, I sat back on my barstool. He sat down next to me and ordered a bottle of whiskey. I sat quietly, trying to make sense of what had just happened.

Eventually, I couldn't stand the silence any longer. "Thank you, Mister Shag. I would've been in real trouble, I guess, if you hadn't happened to come along."

"Heh. Yeah. Whole lotta trouble. But weren't no coincidization I were here. Feral asked me ta look fer ya."

"She did? Why?"

"She were worried 'bout you. Said you got funny and quiet and then split. She didn't say so, but I got the feelin' she thinks you were mad at her, and she didn't know what fer. And she were feelin' kinda torn up inside."

"Well, yeah, of course I was mad. She was flirting with that Draenei chick, right in front of me. As if I wasn't there!" Feral, feeling torn up? That didn't sound right. I mean, she's the strong one...

"Hmm. There's flirtin' and then there's flirtin'. I don't the girl that well, but I does know she's pretty far off the top of the impulsive scale. And I knows a bit 'bout being impulsive. And what I figgers is, what ya comes back to at the end of the day when the crazy wears off is what be what's really important to ya. And what she's wanting is you. What you wants is yer job ta figger out."

So. He walked me out of there, back up to the Terrace of Light. Once we got there I said I wanted to be alone for a bit and he said yeah sure kid just stay up here away from the scummy lupperglumpers cause he werent rescuing my dainty arse again tonight. So I did. And I thought. And I tried to figure out how I really feel, and what I want to do now, but it's hard. I mean, I'm mad at Feral for flirting with someone else, but I'm also mad at myself for running off like I did. And if that really did hurt Feral, then I feel guilty about it. And I'm really embarrassed about how easily I got duped by that scumbag Dovid. And I want to think I could have taken care of myself in Lower City, but I'm not really sure anymore. And should I go back to Feral and apologize, or insist that she apologize? Or wait for her to come to me? Or just go on and pretend like none of this happened? Because, I really, really wish it had never happened.

And now the sun has come up. And I still don't know what to do.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

Melting Faces in AV

So, I ain't done a lot of PvPing as a dworc. 'Cause, well, I had plenty else on me plate. But if I wants ta go to Mount Hyjal I needs me a PvP trinket, preferably the 2-minute one. So off to AV I goes. Well first I stopped at some quartermasters and picked up a few pieces of Satin Battlegear, so's to have some resilience and more health. Then I went to AV.

Holy freak I does a lot of damage. Shadow Word: Pain on every bugger what moves adds up after a bit. Throw in some Mind Blasts and some Mind Flays, and I's near the top of the damage table if I focus on pure O or pure D. Course, lotta times I ends up holding a graveyard or tower until it caps, 'cause it's gotta be done and most other fupperglunkers cain't be bothered, and that downtime cuts inta me total damage. But still, I's rockin' the house. And that be pretty fun. Imagine what I'd be capable of if'n I had serious PvP gear. So after a few days in AV, with some Eye of the Storm thrown in fer variety, I gots me trinket. Rage Winterchill, here I comes.

Oh, and just fer funs, here's a conversation I had with a sunny-side-seeing bugger hanging out at the battlemasters in Shatt yesterday.