Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Kinnavieve vs. Bishop Kid

Or were it Bishop Play? I cain't be bothered fer ta remember which were which...

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Anyone Got Any Princeling Kibble?

So the king wanted Phoenicia ta take his offspring down ta the harbor fer ta rally the fleet. Were just likes Orphan Week, onlies more regal and all. Now, the docks, they's got all kinds of opportunities fer ta educationify a young lad - rum, tattoos, whoors, gettin' yer arse whupped in a barroom brawl - but Phoe done were given orders ta show the boy the Advanced Alliance Interrogation Techniques, which can be summarized as follows:

"Tell me what you know!"
"I don't know anything."
"I said, Tell Me What You Know!"
"But I really don't know anything."
"Oh, all right. I'll go yell at some other bugger."

Then they went on ta a farm, where they practiced Further Advanced Alliance Interrogation Techniques, where yer allowed ta beat the crap outta yer suspect, provided he done eaten a cow first. Ya, I never did understand the Alliance neither.

Afters, she bought him some ice cream and took him home ta the orphanage palace.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Is Where Delicate Sensibilities Will Be Protected

Phaedra done complained what this post were not given proper warnings of its mature contentifications. One could argue what this whole blog ain't safe fer work (or play, or sharing a solar system with, or what have ya), but we here wants ta be sensitive ta our readers' needs. So.

The offending post done be renamed "Is Where There Is Forbidden Love (NSFW If'n Ya Work In A Hatchery)". Future posts will have similar warnings up frontish as needed, such as "NSFW If'n Yer A Dairy Farmer", "NSFW If Ya Is A Custodial Engineer", "NSFW If Ya Had Cold Pizza Fer Breakfast", and, of course, "NSFW If Ya Used Ta Be A Lawyer But Gave It Up Fer Ta Be A Sloth Wool Farmer". Don't wanna be upsettin' them sloths, afters all. Buggers get vicious.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Loose Ends. I Ties Them.

First it were this:

Then came this cheevement:

Then I slaughtered cultists fer this one:

And it all done addified up to:

Which means I now be known as:

Mom, she were real proud. She went all outs, havin' the whole family over, servin' up a Kaldorei roast, tappin' a keg of Uncle Bonechomper's Day Old Piss, the whole nine and three-quarters yards.

Dad, bein' Dad, he were proud too, but 'stead of sayin' so he just left it at "Why fuhg ain't ya gots 55 reps yet?" and drank another beer. But I knew what he meant.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Well, Damn.

Doncha hate it when the music done stops, and yer one of the ones still holdin' a severed peon head? Yeah, it's a crummy feelin', but if'n yer gonna play sometimes is gonna happen. Is happened before, and will probablies happen again. Is one of them risks what ya takes.

Today, in the space of about a half an hour, half of Black Leather Undies' raiding team went and announced what they was done adventurin' in Azeroth. Fer some it were the RL boss forcin' they's hand, fer others it were onwee.... enuoi.... annual.... bugger it. They was readies fer ta do sumthin' else. And with that, our brief but very enjoyable run - normals, then heroics, then raiding - done come to an end.

Me, I's gonna keep on adventurin'. Not likelies what I'll be raidin' fer a while though - not before summers, anywho. Too many other issues what get in the way of makin' a regular schedule. Instead I'll be tiein' up some loose ends, helpin'  the other team members make they's seasons, and helpin' keep the flanks securified so's them what be leadin' the fight ain't gots ta worry about gettin they's supply lines cut up. Ain't glamorous work, but is still importants.

Ta wraps this up, here be a few pics I took along the way, fer memorables sake.


Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Is Where There Is Forbidden Love (NSFW If'n Ya Work In A Hatchery)

Lesser Creature Overseer (5th class) Kil'ssarrass hissed in pleasure. His gills flexed outward, capillaries dilating. Before him stood Kelp Harvester Mrrlrrgrrlrr, and it was clear what she was here for. Provocatively she extended one webbed foot towards him, tempting him with that which no former Highborn lady could offer, those most tender and intimate morsels of flesh: toes.

Kil'ssarrass' internal genitalia stirred, becoming.... still internal and inconsequentially small. He crouched down before her, reaching outward, afraid this beauty, this vision, this goddess would withdraw. But no! Mrrlrrgrrlrr was offering herself to him, and him alone. His fingers touched her toes, stroking them, tenderly at first, then faster, harder, the intensity reaching a fever pitch.

Mrrlrrgrrlrr grew hot from the passion, her body temperature a full one-tenth of a degree above that of the surrounding water. In one bold move, she ripped off all of her clothes (a small seashell bracelet). Kil'ssarrass' eyes hungrily feasted on her clammy, now naked flesh.

Suddenly, she pushed him away. Diving for the sea floor, she urgently dug a shallow trench in the sand. Mad with lust, she frantically laid approximately five thousand roe in the redd, then moved to the side, her nictitating membranes fluttering with desire.

Kil'ssarrass moved to cover the trench with his body, his vestigial pelvic spurs anchoring him in place. The thrill of it all, the forbidden love, the sheen of slime on her skin, the knowledge that they could be surprised at any moment by a party of heavily-armed adventurers fulfilling some quest drove him mad with excitement. His passion rose higher and higher as he floated motionless in the water until small muscles deep in his body made minor twitches, and a thin film of milt was ejected from his cloaca to gently drift down and coat the roe. He fell to the side, utterly spent.

Later, as they floated side by side in the current, each chewing a raw longjaw mud snapper, Kil'ssarrass turned to Mrrlrrgrrlrr and asked, "So, was it good for you too?"

Friday, March 4, 2011

Dude.

What glubbernuggin' faction does I has to kiss copiousnessified arse grind rep with fer ta get me one of these mounts? Half elephant, half bat, and half tank??!? I totally needs me one.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

I Know A Virile Orc What Swallowed A Worm

Just opened his throat...
...and down went the symbiote.

He swallowed the worm to catch the worm.
He swallowed the worm to catch the worm.
He swallowed the worm to catch the worm.
He swallowed the worm to catch the worm.
He swallowed the worm to catch the worm.
He swallowed the worm to catch the worm
That wriggled and jiggled and made him squirm.
He swallowed the worm to catch the worm.
I don't know why he swallowed that worm. You'd think he'd learn.