Monday, May 30, 2011

Is Where This Blog Saves A Bugger

This here comment got left on me post about inscription. The spam filter blocked it, I can see what it be a sincere appreciatification of me hard work and inspirational storifyings. I's glad me simple blog done be able fer ta touch people's lives so profounds.

I want to express some appreciation to the writer for bailing me out of this type of trouble. After browsing throughout the world wide web and meeting notions that were not pleasant, I believed my entire life was done.
plenty of fish

Still not sure what the fish thing be about. Mebbe is a nelf expression....

Friday, May 27, 2011

Is The Fury Warrior Guide Ta Inscriptification

So, Phoenicia done be takin' a break from diggin up half of Stranglethorn lookin' fer the Sword What Don't Exist Anyhow. 'Stead, she's gone an' maxed out her Inscriptifyin' skills, and did some dabblin' ta see if'n she could make some money at it.

Now Scribblin' is supposed ta be a good moneymaker. Ya makes a bajillion different glyphs, saturate the market, and spreadsheetify yer way ta riches. Or mebbe yer supposed ta be makin' all them Darkmoon cards and turn'em inta decks of eight and go ta the Fair and sell fer a crapton. Or sumthin'. I cain't be bothered fer ta rememberfy the details. And me? I's just a simple orc from Durotar, but Phoenicia - she's a Fury Warrior. They make us prot specs look like regular Lichtensteins. They's idea of tactics is "shout, get angry, hit really hard, repeat until it's smushed." So, we hadda come up with a system fer someone what's like ta show up at the AH Monday morning still drunk and half nekkid. Or mebbe nekkid and half drunk. Is depends.

Anywho, this be what we worked out. First, buy all the whipyertails and twilight jazzes what be below yer set price. Fifty gold a stack seems ta be workin' well these days. If there's a lot, buy it all, and if there's none fer that price don't buy any. Use an add-on fer ta empty the mailbox so's ya save time. Then, ya mills it all. Again, an add-on (we like Panda) or a macro will keep ya from goin' crazier than a Miskatonic U. research assistant. Inkify all yer pigments. Watch a movie while yer doin' it. Now fer the steps.

Step the One: Forgify a document. Give it ta today's sucker fer easy money.

Step the Two: If yer sold out, make a dozen or so disappearification dusts. Put these on the AH at whatevers the current market price is.

Step the Three: Make all the Mystery Machine Fortune Cards ya got ink left fer. Okay, mebbe save a tenth of it or so. Watch another movie while ya does it. Sell these in stacks of five at current market price or ten gold, whichever be lower. A lot more folks will buy at ten than at thirty, we's found. These may sell in an hour, mebbe take a few days, but they will sell out. Always do. Once they does, you's done made enough gold back fer ta cover the cost of buyin' yer herbs. This means yer inferno inks is free. Ain't that shiny?

Step the Four: Make relisigilibratotems. Is three kinds - jaw, leaf, and eyeball - so ya makes one of each. You'll gotta buy a heap of volatiles (stock up if prices is low) plus them parts from the vendor way fuhg out in Twilight Highlands (buy a bunch so's ya ain't goin back each day). Put'em on the AH at the current price, and be prepared fer ta defend yer position of havin' the cheapest prices on the AH. Check in regularlies and cancel and relist if any jumperjugger undercuts ya. If'n ya can get the mobile AH, that's just plain mad leet hax fer this. When one relic sells, make a new one and list it. Phoe's been ables fer ta sell one a day, every day, fer some time now, at like about a thousand gold profit each. Not shabby.

So, that's it. Surely ain't the way ta make the most money ya can turnin' pro, but it covers yer costs and buys epic flyin fer the younger team members withouts takin too much time. When ya cain't count ta twelve without takin' off yer shirt, that ain't bad at all.

Friday, May 20, 2011

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

So Ol' Man Ilhoof Sez Ta Me...

"I always heard what wimmenz liked a man with a long wriggling staff. But it's never really worked out the way I thoughts it would. How abouts you take it, Ratters? Mebbe it'll pay off fer you, seeings as yer amazingly virile and all."

"Dude," I sez. "It's got, like, four tentacles."

"Ya," he sez, shuffling his hooves kinda sad like. "I figgered, ya know, it'd be betters that way. Help me catch a woman what'd be, well, a goer. But I could never close the deal. I think Kil'rek done gets more play than me."

"Well, yeah, yer prolly right. Go ahead and give it here. I know me an egotistical priest what likes fer ta get her antlers stroked, if nuthin' else."

Well, okay, that ain't exacty how it went down. But it sure be a better storification than "I roflstomped him and then done looted his dead arse."

Sunday, May 8, 2011

This Bugger's Worse Than That Turtle

Seriously. Dude. We're looking fer the exit. Big fluggernubbin' gate, connectifies the courtyard with the rest of the world. We's done walked past it three times alreadies. The hell made you think it were up these stairs anyhow??!?

Friday, May 6, 2011

Proof What Blizzard Hates Alliance

When ya gets the fishing daily Clammy Hands in Org, ya gets ta have to get past ... um ... level 10 non-hostile crabs fer ta get yer clams. But when ya does the Alliance equivelish.... equalitate.... bugger it. Nearly the same thing. Ya gets ta go party in the harbor with level 85 sharks, what loves fer ta munch on low-season adventurers. As the Warrior With No Name found out yesterdays.
Yup, Blizz hates Alliance. Heh-hehe-heh-HEH-hehe.....

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Friday Night Drunken Fighting Words Quotifications

So thunkernubbin' drunk I done went back in time and publishified thish two days early. Oh wellsh. That what be seen cain't be unsheen.

Kinnavieve: I wish to have no connection with any weapon that is not epic, for I intend to go in harm'sh way.

Alayda:Oh, better dat her shattered hulk
Should sink beneat' de wave;
Her thunders shook de mighty deep,
And dere should be her grave; ....hic!
Nail to de mast her holy flag,
Set every t'readbare sail,
And give her to de god of storms,
De lightning and de gale!....hic!
Ya mon!

Danger Mouse: Nutssh!

Phoenicia: We shaa barnie oan th' beachesh, we shaa barnie oan th' landin' groondsh, we shaa barnie in th' fields an' in th' streets, we shaa barnie in th' hillsh; we shaa ne'er shurrender!

Jinnik: Scorn and defiance; shlight regard, contempt,
And any thing that may not mishbecome
The mighty sender, doth he prize you at....hic!

Ratshag: Due to the Twilight's Hammer'sh legacy of drivin' glubbernuggin' volcanoes through certain orcs' houshes, they's about fer to be taught a lesson in the real fuhggin ushe of power. You buggers is gonna be witneshshes.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Guest Blogger: Creighton

Well, he kicked me out. Said he was tired of me chasing his cat and peeing on his rose bushes. Of course, he didn't mention the time he chewed up my wand and then buried it in the backyard, did he? Oooh, nooo.

It's just as well. He was okay and all, but it's not like he was the Light's Gift to Gilneas.  Mostly I was sticking around as an excuse to avoid the Darnassian meat market. I mean, some of those druid boys are good to look at, all tall and dark and glowery, but after ten thousand years of the old same old some old, they're looking for something new. And as both a shapeshifting wolf and a practicer of the arcane arts, I'm as trendy as can be right now. I'm willing to be a lot of things, but somebody's boytoy fashion accessory ain't one of them.

So, it's time for a new beginning. I've got my robe, my staff, and my top hat (a gentleman must always dress the part, no matter how long and sharp his claws) and I've bought a ticket for Darkshore. And we shall see what the world has to offer.