Friday, May 30, 2008
"Oh! Uh... nobody, Palintera. Just a ... uh ... someone raising funds for the rehabilitaion of Blood Elves."
"Mom! Was that Feral? Did you tell her I wasn't home again?"
"Now, dear. I don't like you spending so much time with that Feralicious girl. I hear she runs with a rough crowd, rogues and warlocks and other unsavory types."
"I heard she doesn't eat granola, and she has a tatoo!" Piped up my little brother. I glared at him, and reminded myself that turning into bear form and smooshing him would be Wrong.
"But Mom, she's my friend, and she's been helping me train-"
"You know, Palintera dear, Mrs. Moonforest's son Belphon is back from his woodcarving internship. He's such a nice boy. Why don't you ask him to go get an ice-cold glass of milk with you at Miss Danlyia's?"
Yeah. Belphon Moonforest. Sure, he's cute enough. And someday he's going to make some lucky girl a good, stable husband, and give her lots of little sqealing Moonforests to brood over. But you know what? He'd never say to me, "Hay Pali? Wanna go kill a dragon?" and he'd never flash that sly grin at me that makes me want to throw caution to the wind so hard it never comes back.
And he'd never stand there face-to-face with Razormaw, so strong and brave, and completely trusting me to keep the healing spells landing.
And afterwards he'd never- well, actually I don't know. Maybe he would wear a dress. But he wouldn't look so pretty in it.
And Belphon Moonforest the woodcarver is never going to know the thrill of transforming into a wild cat, with speed and power and cunning. Lithe and fierce and stealthy and beautiful eyes and beautiful soft fur like purple velvet wrapped around a steel-forged weapon and a so-contented rumbly purr when you... when... Um. Ahem. Well. He just isn't.
So, Belphon Moonforest isn't for me. I want my 'licious Feral, and if my mother doesn't approve then that is just too darn bad. /humph
Although, I'd really appreciate if you didn't mention any of this to her. Okay? Thanks! Bye!
Thursday, May 29, 2008
[16:40] Lady Jess: ya know what they say...ya can lead an orc to water, but ya can't make em bathe
[16:41] Ratshag: ya gots to shove 'em all the way in
[16:41] Lady Jess: and hold em under
[16:41] Ratshag: and shake thoroughly
[16:42] Lady Jess: and wear protective gear
[16:42] Ratshag: bring friends to help
[16:42] Lady Jess: clearly a 10 man objecive
[16:43] Lady Jess: 25 on a bad day
[16:43] Ratshag: 6 healers, minimum
[16:43] Lady Jess: 6 hunters to chain trap
[16:44] Lady Jess: or one BRK
[16:44] Lady Jess: and a TJ to keep everyone under control
[16:44] TemerityJane: RAWR!
[16:45] Lady Jess: and cookies...for after
[16:45] Ratshag: Mmmm
[16:46] Softi: cookies? who's got da cookies?
[16:46] Lady Jess: TJ has em
[16:46] Softi: TJ! Gief cookies!!!
[16:49] Lady Jess: there will be no giefing of cookies those are for controlling of the orc bathing process
So. Story starts with me and 24 guildies assembling down in the Coilfang Reservoir. Fer the first time, I didn't have ta think, Does I go left or right? Nope, it were straight up the middle and inta the Serpentshrine Cavern. Once we got there and was setting everything up, there was a calm, rational discussion as to which party I should be assigned to:
Then, I remindified Mr BRK what he done promised ta throw a misdirect on me, just like in me old tanking days. But he said, Nopes, couldn't be done.
First fight of the night were Unstable Hydross, and we put her outta her miserable insanity right quick. Then it were time fer the Lurker.
And then it were time fer Madam Fishy. The guild's beaten her once before, but even fer thems what had been in on that fight there were still learnings ta do. I'd done read up would I could on it, but I tells ya, it be one heckuva wild fight. We took six cracks at her, but only just made it ta Phase 3 on the last try. Phase 1 be mostly just tank & spank, so that were straightforward. But Phase 2 ya got elementals what gotta be burned down, and Naga warriors what gotta be tanked, and then these striders what walk around fearing the befreakers outta anyone what gets too close. And then there's that whole tainted core craziness.
Me job were ta help deal with the strider. First coupla times, I really didn't know what were going on and I didn't do too hot. Third time I picked the dunkerhugger up right quick, but I got one-shotted by a Naga what came up behind. But afters that I got the hang of it. Mostly I Mind Flayed'em, 'cause that slowed the buggers down and (I thinks) made it easier on the warlocks and mages what was kiting and burning. Meant less dps fer me, but I think it were a good trade. We was definitely putting they's areses down right quick, anywho, once we had the hang of it. Nobody ever tossed me a core, so I didn't haveta deal with that, but I thinks that were 'cause I were standing near the middle so's I could track the strider easies.
Anywho, here's a couple pics from the fight. First is us getting all buffied before taking another crack at her (pay no attention to the morale-lowering skeletons):
So that be the tale of me first real raid, as opposed to me tagging along on a badge farming run. It were one heckuva fun time fer me, and I's lookin' forwards to doing more of it.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
So, first chance I had, I picked up an axe and hit the road. Never looked back. So, what is I doing now? Farming. Ain't that a kick in the tenders.
'Course, it ain't tubers er beans er wheatgerms I's farming. Naw, I's farming gold. 'Cause gold can then be used fer to buy primals and gems and enchanting mats, all of which I needs real bad these days ta get me priestie self up ta standards. Now, I's tried farming primals direct-like, but fer the most part I finds I'm better off running dailies fer the Dorkbabies and using the proceeds ta buy what I needs. And what is it I's needing these days? I so glad you asked.
Been working on me Frozen Shadoweave Robe. Gonna look real spiffy, and I just needs two more shadowcloth ta finish it. Get a guildie ta cut a couple Runed Living Rubies, and someone else to slap some Resto Mana Prime mojo on it, and I's good ger a long time there. Next up is gonna be a Belt of Blasting, fer which I already got one Nether Vortex and mebbe seven primal fires. So I's like halfway, give er take. Still gonna need a buncha gold ta finish it (plus more Runed Living Rubies), but it'll be a big upgrade over me Sash of Seal's Fate. And then I'll needs ta buy a ton of Fel Armament and Marks of Sargface ta get me Aldork rep up and get they's high power shoulder enchant. And then, I hopes, I can ease up on this bloody farming. Fer a while, anywho.
Friday, May 23, 2008
Well, now I's pissed off. You gonna take content from somebody else's blog, you damn well owe them a "thankee" and a link in yer text. Especiallies if yer a big time outfit like WI what be using that content to try to make money. And I sez boo. Booooo on WoWInsider and they's rude manners.
Fer great justice:
Keredria (healer): Tree of Life
Jessika (tank): Pretty in Plate
update: The WoWInsider article now shows links to K and jess' blogs in the text. Thankee - I appreciates that.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
So, few days ago Blizz drops the banhammer on several hundred thousand accounts, mainly fer suspected botting. One of the accounts were that of Lamaa, one of me Aetherial Circle guildies. TJ's got his particulars. Now, what I knows is, Lamaa's a nice guy. And people whose opinionations I trust is convinced he ain't a cheater. And I knows what all Blizz has told him be a generic TOS violation. No specifics.
Now, I's just a simple orc, so I's well aware of how much I don't know. Mebbe Lamaa had some software he shouldn't have. Mebbe his running on WINE/Linux with a G15 tripped a flag. Mebbe his name were in the wrong database. Mebbe Lamla were the one what was supposed ta get banned, but it got typoed. I dunno, but nobody else will neither unless some unlucky bugger digs through the actual facts, which I's betting ain't happened yet, since his notice didn't say "On March 17 you were detected to be running GlideBot 7000 Verion 2.37a in AV, you BAD BAD MAN." And since there's probably a gazillion others all appealing, and since appeals apparentlies all gots go through the Billing Dept, and since they already gots his money fer the next three months, I ain't expecting anything ta happen fer a long, long time.
And that's what's buggin' me. I got no problem with banning cheaters. I ain't that upset about false positives - is gonna happen. What I is unhappy about is the crappy appeal system. Go through the billing department? They know nuthin' about either the technicals nor the legals. How can they possibly evaluate if a ban is legit? How can they handle all the appeals what is surely coming in? If Blizz wants to be a mature, serious business, they's gots to do a better job of managing they's customers. Dropping the banhammer and leaving it to Elune to sort out the mess ain't right.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Monday, May 19, 2008
(I's gonna try to remember ta record it fer thems what can't make, but no promises)
Fortunatelies, turns out I already gots me a friend over here. This damn fine tasty piece of druidflesh be Bellwether. Say hello, you buggers. She went and got me some netherweave bags, and it only cost me some personal services, which were a win-win trade in me book.
We had us some fun, going down inta the Deadmines and busting Defias heads. Well, okay. She did the busting. Me, I mostly stood back and tried not to get me arse pounded, 'cause as a lowbie spacegoat I's pretty squishy. A few times one of them Defias hunkerduggers managed ta hide in a corner 'til she'd gone by, then run out and whack me. And since somebody whom I will not name but it starts with Bellwethe fergot ta bring any rezzing reagents, I hadda haul me blue-with-a-tail-on-it arse back from the graveyard each and every time.
After a few of these episodes me bodyguard suggested mebbe I should go starkers, supposedly to save wear-and-tear on the gear. I think she just wanted ta see if I had me any more long, waggly appendages hidden away.
That Defias Digger, he weren't sticking around ta find out.
But it all turned out okay. I got me some nice loots, including Smite's Mighty Hammer, the Cruel barb, and Cookie's Tenderizer (in case I feels culinary). Then we went back to the Westfall Inn, where she totally had her way with all me tentacles, and then it were time to say our goodbyes. The next time I tried me magic transformer, I were me regular dwarf form again. So. Huh. Dunno what quite ta make of all this. But it were funs while it lasted.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Some men come around here,
Sent from the FBI
They's bookin' me on suspicion
Ain't got no alibi
They wants to know where I was
Ten o'clock last night ...hic
Man, I was in the arms of
The police chief's wife
And I may never get nuthin'
Fer the resht of me life
But I got some satisfaction
From her last night
It's a riot!
It's a riot! ...hic
It's a riot!
It's a full-fledged, out-in-the-street, get-nekkid RIOT!
You make my heart sing!
You make everything groovy.
Wild Thing I think I love you
But I wanna know for sure!
So C'mon 'n' hold me tight.
I love you.
Ratshag the dworc:
Wild Thing I think you move me!
Ahhh, just came to me mind, thought I'd say that.
You made me trust you then stabbed a knife in me heart!
You're a lying unfaithful untrustable tramp and I think I love you!
Oh bugger Pali's throwing things at me!
Let me resst in peace
Let me get shome sshleep
Let me take my love and bury it
In a hole ssix foot deep
I can lay my body down
But I can't find my sweet release
Sho, let me resst in peace
Agh Glaghal Glaghal,
gahaglha galgaha allagh
gagglah ahaggh ahaggh ahaggh!
Is thanks to Starz, the Troggs, Sam Kinison, Joss Whedon, and the Kingsmen (I thinks)
Friday, May 16, 2008
This is now.
Rolled into the deep bowels of the Hellfire Citadel be the Pit Lord Magtheridon, former ruler of Outland and now prisoner of that par-Nelf, part-demon, part-life insurance salesman Illidan. Now I's all for keeping demons locked up, but apparentlies Illidan's peeps done been siphoning off his blood for ta make Fel Cocktails for the Friday night drunkens and not inviting none of us. Which is just dang rude. So we decide ta put Maggy's arse down.
And that's just what we did. There were tanking and healing and dps'ing and getting bounced around and a whole lotta clicking which did something, but I don't know what, 'cause I can't be bothered ta keep track of the details. And of course there were the Vampiric Touching, in all the naughty places. And then ol' Mags were dead, and I got ta take his big-ass head back to Honor Hold, where they put it on a big stick for to help manage the local fly population. And they gave me this shiny ring fer me troubles. Even better, when I got back to Shatt, Deputy Glowy Crystal Dude In Charge of Phat Lewts Asuur done gave me this nifty dress ta wear, which were a big improvement over the rag what the Aldorks had sold me. T4, they calls it. Now, I'll be replacings it with me own hand-made Frozen Shadoweave dress before too long, but it'll hold me fer a while.
And after we'd put Maggy's giant arse down, we all flew up ta the Blade's Edge Mountains and did the same fer old Gruul the... the .... the... bugger. I cain't remember what the fuhg he is. Well, the chubbernugger is dead now, so it don't really matter, do it? Here's a pic of his dead-arsed self:
No lewts fer ratter outta this place, but that don't matter none. I had me a great time, and I's looking forwards to whattever come next. By the way, here's a shot of Ratter, looking all non-shadowy fer a minute so's you can admire me threads.
One last thing. BRK done put up the WWS numbers, and they show me throwing down a little overs 700 dps fer Mags and the High King Ugly, and 626 fer Gruul. Is these good? Bugger'd if I know. No other shadow priests in the raid fer direct comparisons. I were near the bottom end of the dps pack, but that ain't surprising since most everybody else were more geared and experienced. So I figgers I'll just hang onta these numbers and see how much I can make'em go up in the futures.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
He's gonna talk about WoW and blogging and mebbe some of his less-unfunny so-called adventures, and pretty much anything else what makes sense at the time. Is gonna go two hours, unless it ends sooner, and I got no plans ta make it a regular thing. So. Ratshag TV, Tuesday, 7:00. Be there or .... bugger, I dunno. Be somewhere else, I guess.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Because I invented the term. Fashoozle.
But maybe it standsss for Many Quiet Octopi Ssend Regrets During Premature Ssenility?
But it does-
Or maybe Murders of Quail Occupy Seven Rotting and Decrepit Pagoda Spires?
No, see, let me explain. A Beast Master Hunter has 41-
Bah! I haven't got all day. Ths Sshadow will embrace you soon, as it embracess everyone, and I need answerss. Why is the kitty not red?
Well, you see, lass, when Bestial Wra-
The "Red" comes from-
I know, but when-
With white stripess!
Because he's a frost-
You should call it BigPurpleWithWhiteSstripesKitty.
And why do you carry an axe?
Ah. It's because this axe has -
Ratter carries an axe. And he hitss things with it.
Well, you see-
But you don't. You desspise hunterss who hit things with their axe.
Of course, a hunter-
You make no sensse. No ssense at all. You should probably go now. And don't pinch my asss!
Young lady, I assure you I did not pinch your ass! Such behavior would not be tolerated by Mrs. BR-
But you were thinking it! Ratterss told me you pinched Ego's ass and put the blame on him.
Now that is not-
Go embrace the Shadow, dwarf. Maybe it can undersstand hunters, but I certainly cannot.
Is also the sound a mob makes when it enrages. Which be fine if it's an ogre. But it's dang creepy when that sound comes outta a dainty little blood elf guard up in Netherstorm. Particularlies when I puts her arse down a mizzisecond after she enrages, and she's still going "GYOGH-GYOGH!" while she's dead on the ground.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Last Friday were the "bring yer stylin' purple pimp hat" Karazhan run. Us clothies were provided a list of pimpish hats we could go hunt up fer ourselves, but unfortunatlies I were too busy getting my Evoker's Helmet of Second Sight ta have time fer fun. So I's the dweeb in the shot what ain't playin' along. No fun Ratter. Them two on the right what ain't got hats but is wearin' Lovely Red Dresses? Well, we can't all be pimps...
Anywho. See that tasty piece of draenanannieflesh on the left there, lookin' all tribal-like? Is none other then Vonya the Egolicious Priest. We's been friends fer a while now, but this were our first time ta meet all face-ta-face like. So that were pretty cool. And we also had Zasp from Team Ego and Rakzha from Team Squeaky, so it were a pretty blogger-heavy group.
So how'd the run go? Went good. Full clear, 22 badges fer everyone. Coupla wipes, but the first one was a trash pull what all the experts said was a known "if yer really really unlucky it aggros half the room" situation, and we was. And the second were bad luck with were the infernals dropped on our first try at Prince. No insane, totally-unearned dps loots fer me, but I's honored with Violent Eye dudes now, so I gots a purple ring from them, and I cashed in a buncha badeges fer this shiny trinket: Icon of the Silver Crescent.
This be us, getting ready fer to pull Prince. I's in there somewhere, but with so many tall Drananeininnies and Nelfs, it be hard ta see short little me in the back...
Edit for Great Justice: Aensu from Team Ego were also in this run, doing excellent tankings, and I totally missed the connection. Bad Ratter. So, even more bloggy goodness in this run!
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Last night my friend Feralicious (from Team Bell) and I went through the trials required of young druids before they can be trained in the art of aquatic form shapeshifting. It was really aexhilirating and fun-and-a-half and I'm so glad Feral waited for me so we could do it together. And just in case my mother is reading this, we were completely finished by 8:30 and went to sleep early under our own separate trees and rose before dawn to eat granola. Or whatever it is she thinks druids are supposed to do.
But, on with the story. We started out in Darnassus, then spelled over to Moonglade to talk to the trainer there. And he said no, no, you need to talk to Mister Bearwalker in Darnassus first. So back to Darnassus, then teleport to Moonglade again, and then off to Darkshore! Except oops, we needed to get a glowy thing out of the lake in Mooglade. So, back to Moonglade. Then, off to Darkshore! And we ran north up the coast to get the first half of the pendant we needed. Except we were heading south. Blah! Turn around! No, that's the road back into Auberdine. This way! This way, 'licious!
Okay, so maybe stopping off at the World's End Tavern before starting the night's work wasn't the best idea. But we got it sorted out, eventually, and then we were awesomesauce. We got the first half, and then traveled halfway around the world to Westfall so we could find the second half. While we were searching in the ocean, minding our own business, not looking for any trouble, 'cause we would never do that, for absolutely NO REASON AT ALL this elite shark, four levels higher than us, attacked! But we are totally awesome, and we so kicked its butt! Or tail. Whatever.
After it was all done, we went back to Moonglade, where Mister Starblaze said "Great! Thank you! Now go back to Darnassus and talk to Mister Bearwalker again. Because even though I'm a druid trainer, I don't feel like training you." Argh. /frustrated Pali. But we went back and finally got trained on how to shapeshift into sea lions. And you know what? It is so amazing! We ran down to the lake in Darnassus, and had a great time playing in the water.
I am a fierce sea lion!
Oh my goddess! How did that picture get in there? 'licious, did you switch my pictures around? Oh, you are so going to get punished! WHERE DID WE LEAVE THOSE HANDCU-
You're still here?
Umm, that last picture? It is so not what it looks like. Nope. Not at all. We were just ... uh ... playing? Good clean innocent fun? Okay?
So... that's it. That's all there is. Bye bye!
oh please Elune don't let my mother see this
Friday, May 9, 2008
'Sides, TJ'd pull me toes off if I did.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
No, seriously, man. It is.
You're just a simple orc. Why would the Universe bother talking to you?
Well, fer one thing, it be very impressed by me awesome virility.
Mmmmm..... okay. You got a point there.
And fer another, who the fuhg else does it got to talk to? Kestrel? Pffftf.
Okay, fine. The Universe is talking to Ratshag. So what is it saying to you?
It's sayin' it wants me ta stay shadow spec.
I thought you wanted to go holy?
No, I wants ta raid. Fer a while it looked like holy were the way to go, but the Universe done changed its mind and is telling me ta embracify the Shadow. Lemme lay it outs fer ya:
I go to Kara, and five dps epics drop fer me, and only one healy epic.
BRK wants me to be shadow, so I can be his mana battery.
TJ agrees with the short little bugger, 'cause she wants to drop some Curse of Shadow action and totally rock the house.
Ego done transferred to Drenden and totally ninja'd the healy raid slot I had me eye on.
So, there it be. The Universe done told me to stay shadow. So that's what I'm gonna do. I checked with teh Squeakie, and she says she's cool with it. Gonna hang onta me healie gear, ya know, in case. But Ratter's gonna commit hisself ta being a brutal shadowy priest of darkness. 'Cause that's how the universe wants it.
So it's friday night. I show up on time. I've got buff food, several stacks of water, a buncha sacred candles fer the prayer of fort. And I'm wearing mostly greens and a few blues from Hellfire and Nagrand. So it be fair to say what my arse is getting carried.
Biggest concern going in was that I'd do sumthin' ignorant and wipe the raid. This did not happen. I did pull a few ignorants, and there were a few wipes, but not at the same time. But overall I thinks I did okay. Did me shackle assignments as I were supposed to, kept Vampiric Touch and SW:P up on the boss fights, and had the sense to heal meself when the holy priest were busy. Need to understand some of the boss fights better, but that'll come with experience. Me dps were the sucks early on, but it definitelies got higher as the night went on, and when I gets me gear gemmed and enchanted and whatnot it'll be higher still.
So what I get? Lessee...
Handwraps of Flowing Thought
Boots of the Infernal Coven
Trial Fire Trousers
Ritssyn's Lost Pendant
Staff of Infinite Mysteries
Signet of Unshakable Faith
Mostly dps gear, so I thinks I'll be sticking with the shadow at least until I can get some more healy epics tailored up.
And along the way, I had me a blast. Big thanks to me guildies what made the night possible, and I's looking forward to going back this week.
Saturday, May 3, 2008
Everybody getting onto the zeppelin were one of the funniest sights of the day. Me, I'd run out ahead so's I could be sure to be on the first one. Lag and frame-rate issues were out in full force, and a number of the racers kept right on running and off the other side...
There was members of Sharvan's family running with us, and I knows they appreciated everybody's kind wishes. So on they's behalf, thankee.
The festivities was still going strong when I had ta leave. Last I heard, they was forming up to go take down Hogger. Big thanks to everybody what came and helped make this a thundering success!