Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Assemble The Minions!

Blizz calls thems "followers", but that sounds way too much like camp followers to me ears, and that ain't they's job. Coulda called them "flying monkeys", "garritroopers", or "flunkeys", but I decided fer ta go with "minions".

Anywho, whatevers ya call'em, they's a new way fer ta kill things an' take they's stuff. Ya gots ta level the buggers up (by sending'em on missions). Then ya gota ta gear'em up (mostlies by buildin' a scrapyard an' sendin' them on missions ta bring back junk, and also by buildin' a dwarfenboonker an' feedin' it work orders). Then, when yer minions is ready, ya can send'em ta Highmaul. This week, Qiana done brought the tankin', with her big bare bear. Goldmane done brought the massive deeps, with him claws an' fangs an' all. An' the Pleasure-Bot 8000 done brought the .... well .... with his .... you know .... mebbe best I leaves that fer yer imaginiationalizings.

Lookie there, is loot.

Inside be a random 655 epic fer yer class an' lootspec - I got me an amulet. Is just as if ya'd gone ta Highmaul yerself. Sorta. Is a slow process - Blizz sez what ya onlies can get one of these raid-level missions every two weeks. Also ain't no guaranties what ya won't get duplicates. Finallies, is no weapons or trinkets.

But, good news is what it only takes a few minutes a day ta send the minions out, then ya can go do yer own thing while they takes care of business. So is can be a helpful way fer ta gear up alts. Also, if'n yer a raider an' has normal mode on farm, the cache starts givin' up heroic level loots. Same if'n yer farmin' heroic, it gives mythic gear.

Is gonna be a very different way fer ta play. I's lookin' forward ta doin' it fer reals next month.


Redbeard said...

That is NOT what I imagine a Pleasure-Bot 8000 would look like. I'd think it would look like either Brad Pitt or Zoe Saldana (yer choice).

That looks like something a Gnome would consider "pleasurable".

Ratshag said...

Ain't no lovin' like the lovin' of a good XT-002 Deconstructor clone. "I guess it doesn't bend that way."

Redbeard said...


All I can think of is "that scene" from Grey's Anatomy. If you don't know what I'm talking about, google "greys anatomy broken [redacted]" and you'll find out.