Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Is Special Welcomes Back Siha Tuesday Night Drunken Singings

Buyin' bread from a pally in Brussels
She were six-foot-four and fulla muscles ...hic!
I said "Do ya speak-a my language, kek?"
She just shmiled and gave me a Bacon of Light sandwich.

And she said:
"I come from the Land Down Under
"Where beer doesh flow and gnomes chunder
"Cantcha hear, cantcha hear the thunder? ...hic!
"Ya better run, ya better take cover!"

So I dids.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Is Like The Family Jewels, Only Different

Reader Mondrinn done asked me what the deal were with these brown items he's been seeing on buggers, and where could he get him some, and did he have ta wait 'til he's in his 80th season. So I sent him an explanationizing, but I figger if someone's asking me is bound ta be other buggers out there wondering too. So I's gonna talk about'em here.

Them brown items is called heirloomies, and they does some nifty stuff. First all, they scale with ya as ya season up. Armor, stamina, crit rating, brains, whatever spec they got keeps pace, so they is always the same as a blue item set fer yer level. Not bad, huh? Next, they's sorta soulbound, but not completely. Ya can send'em through the mail system ta other members of yer team, and shares as needed. Unfortunately, there ain't no way ta get'em across the faction barrier, so fer examples I couldn't hand one to Phoenicia or Pali. And no gettin' from one serververse to another, short of smuggling a whole team member over. Final nifty thing is, the shoulders? They gives a 10% XP boost fer quests and killings. Nice fer those of ya what got alts wanting to get ta they's 80th season.

So, Ratters, I want! How I get? I's so glad you asked. Ya buys them with either Emblems of Heroism, what drop off of heroic-level and raid bosses, or with Stone Keeper's Shards, what drop off of any dungeon boss when yer faction controls Wintergrasp, or buy flying over there and doing quests. Ta gets the first ones, ya gots ta be in yer 80th season; fer the second, ya don't gots to, but it helps. Emblems buy heirloomies what be optimized fer PvE while Shards buy gear what be optimized fer PvP, but ain't no law saying ya can't use'em fer leveling, especiallies with that 10% XP bonus. Here's a list of Emblem heirloomies, what ya can buy in Dalaran, and here's a list of Shard gear what ya buy in Wintergrasp.

So, heirloomies is shoulder armor, weapons, and trinkets. If yer one of them classes what learns ta wear a new type of armor at the 40th season, like us warriors gettin' plate, is no worries. The heirloomy armor will adapt itself to you, so fer example The Shiny Polished Spaulders of Valoriciousness acts as mail untilk ya dings 40. Word is, is gonna be more heirloomies in 3.2, including chest armor what gives another 10% XP bonus. Stacks with the bonus from the shoulders, if ya gots both, for 20% extra experience!

So there ya gots it. Hopes it were helpful ta one or two or eleventy-six of you buggers.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Is A Quick Tournament Note

Fer us protection warriors, is somthins ya gots ta remember when getting on yer jousting mount. Be sure ta switch outta Defensive Stance, or yer gonna get hit with a 5% penalty to yer damage. Is especiallies a pain with gargoyles, where they go from needing two hits ta do the job ta three. Is stupids, but ya gots to remember it.

The fact what jousting is a stupid way fer a warrior ta have ta earn a living no matters what stance, I shall talk about another time, bcause I ain't talking about it now.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Is Where Vyprania Gets An Avatar

I am an instrument of Death. Two centuries defending my homeland with the Sentinels, personally chosen by Arthas to be one of his elite Death Knights, trained by Instructor Razuvious, forged in battle by Baron Rivendare, and honed to a perfect edge by Highlord Mograine. The dead rise or explode at my bidding, and my enemies scatter like leaves before my plagues and strikes.

And what does Ratshag choose as an avatar to represent me on this blog and on the guild forums? As an iconic image of my fearsomeness and lethality?





Well, okay, it is cute.

(Editor's note: Is big thankees ta Pike fer her fine aristry!)

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Is Where The Bear Says “Woo hoo hoo hoooo!”

Hello gentle readers,

Last night I went into the depths of the Obsidian Sanctum with my new guild. I was very excited to be sharing the tanking duties with Windshadow of Big Bear Butt Blogger. And well, umm, yes, there it is, in all its, well, bigness, bounding off ahead of everyone. We were after a renegade member of the Black Dragonflight named Sartharion, and I was a little nervous after not having been in a raid for several months. Would I remember how to be a tank? But just like falling off a bicycle, it all came back to me fairly quickly. Well, most of it, anyway. The ten of us took care of Sartharion and his allies, and I was lucky enough to find a new helmet to wear for when I am not tanking, replacing this one. I can't show it to you though. It makes me look like, well, one of them, and I just hate that. So, invisible it stays!

It was a really grand adventure, and I am really looking forward to having more!

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Is Where Ratters Is A Six-Year-Old Hispanic Girl

Well here I is with another title and a crapton of achievements fer ta go withs. Some of it were pretty easy. I mean, I had all Outland explored over a year ago. Northrend, I got me that taken care of soon as I got me Cold Weather Flying trained up. Well, that and some woolen undies. But some of them others...

Out in Dun Morogh them vertically-challenged buggers did they's best ta give me a hard time. Seems they's still pissed about me role in 500 baby Taurens stampeding through Iron Forge last year...

Stanglethorn Vale still be full of zombie pirate nagas and snakes what crawl up yer pants and try ta get most inappropriately intimates and Nessingwary goons runnin' around and shootin' they's guns and scarin' me chicken.

Did you know there's a buncha elite green dragons hiding way back in Ashenvale? I does now.

But finally, there I was, deep in Bug Country. Got to them gates, and ding! ding! ding! I were done.

And yeah, of course, I hadda go and have me eyes closed fer the celebrationalizing pictograph. Great googly moogly.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Best Served Way Fuhggin Cold

We all went through it. Workin' our way through Hellfire Peninsula, hackin' down unhousebroken orcs and demon pigs and them real nasty oozes. And while we was earnin' an honest living, killin' the bad guys fer thems what paid us, along came one of them gubberlunkin' giant robots, movin' way quieter than anything that dang big had a right to, and stomped our hard workin' arses inta the dirt.

And we hated them.

But the world is different now. We's in our eightieth season. Maybe we's got us a few epics, or even a crapton of them from Uld-25. Or maybe is all crafted blues and some drops from Old Strat. Don't matter. 'Cause now, we can go back to Hellfire, and we can give them flumperbuggin' toasters some. Old. Fashioned. Payback.

Revenge. It do taste sweet. Especiallies served cold.