Whar Be Me Boomstick?

Kadomi done touched on this issue with her damn fine Pre-raid Shopping List, but I's gonna go inta more details and call Blizz a buncha felweed-smokin' warrior-hatin' fluggernubbers. 'Cause they is.

Fer the first time, I's gearin' up and gettin' ready fer ta tank current raid content as meself - no magical gnomish transmogrifier what made me a dorf, not sendin' in Kinna or any other alt. Is gonna be me. Prot warrior. Virile comma amazing. Is coming along at a steady pace right now - a little more rep, a few more Justice Badgers, and I'll have a level 85 blue in every slot, all properly itemezified and everythings.

...Excepts fer that green Muffled Blunderbuss in the boomstick slot. What the fuhg?

Turns out, there ain't no blue warrior-itemized ranged weapons. None. Nowhere. Not drops, not quest rewards, not crafted, not rep, not badgers. Zilch. Blizz designed one, but then fergots ta add it ta anybodies loot table, so it exists only on wowhead. Now, such weapons weren't always the easiest ta find, but they did exist. Fer examples, the Boomstick in Outland or the Weighted Throwing Axe in Northrend. And if yer thinkin' "Ratters! Why doncha just pick up a readily-available reasonably priced gun from a trained-up engineer in the tradition of the Gyro-Balanced Khorium Hawtness and the Armor Plated Combat Shitstorm?" That'd be fine, except there ain't one. Engineers can only learns fer ta make Agi-based hunter trash.

But what does we see when we looks at relics, the new Grand Unified ReliToteLibraSigils? We see no fewers than four Strength-based blues at this level: two dps, one tanking, and one fer either. All suitable pallies, death nuggets, and maybe droods (bears is weird though, so I ain't sure. Anywho.). Blizz even hotfixed the mats on the Jawbone fer ta make'em easier ta craft. Just ta adds injuries ta insults, is two more LibraSigils fer sale if'n ya got a handful of Valor badgers. Boomsticks? Not so much.

Double you. Tee. Eff.

Someone needs fer ta tell Blizz ta stop hatin' us warriors. Either thats, or don't smoke quite so much glubbernuggin' felweed when they's plannin' out the upgrades.

The Stone Rabbit

One 'shroom makes you faster
And one 'shroom makes you small
And the ones that have red dots
Blow your brains across the wall

Go ask a fungal
When he's ten feet tall

A Prayer To The Light

Tonight, I slew five of my brothers and sisters.

Their bodies had died years ago, but their tombs have been desecrated by mana thieves, and now their spirits were disturbed and angry. The troll priest said killing them again would bring them the peace they deserved. Did he speak the truth, or was he manipulating me for his own purposes? He gave me a shiny trinket after I had finished the task. Does that mean my actions were just?

I returned to Outland to fight demons. To ensure the safety of my people, and our homeland. To protect those who could not protect themselves.

Yet tonight, I slew five of my brothers and sisters.

I struck them down with my mace, and burned them with holy fire. When I had finished, I destroyed the wicked thieves who had disturbed their graves, and gladly accepted the bounty on their heads. Did that make my actions right?

I am a Soldier of the Light. I fight for justice, and goodness, and righteousness; to destroy evil in all its forms and to serve the people of the world, be they strong or weak.

Tonight, I slew five of my brothers and sisters. May the Light accept their souls and grant them the peace they deserve.

And may It give Its servant the strength to accept Its judgment of her.

Still A Damn Fine Ass

Thankee, Alex. Yer still lookin' pretty nice yerself.

They Still Don't Seems Ta Understands, Do They?

I don't have nightmares.

Nightmares.

Have.

Me.

Is Where We Discuss The Beach From Hell

If yer Horde, and ya been ta the Twilight Highlands, you know the one.

[10:16] ratshag: I think the naga beach just has some settings wrong 
[10:16] ratshag: very, very wrong 
[10:16] llanion: Well, I think that NAGA MISTRESS 
[10:16] llanion: NAGA MISTRESS 
[10:16] llanion: NAGA SPEARMAN
[10:16] stop: Counterpoint: surely NAGA MISTRESS
[10:17] stop: hold on, I've just got to loot this b- NAGA FOURSOME
[10:17] ratshag: NAGA SPEARMAN 
[10:17] ratshag: true, but NAGA MISTRESS
[10:18] Bre: *gigglesnort* 
[10:18] Bre: jeez, must I do the beach when I get there?

Across The Cavern, Our Eyes Met

She were fifty tall and weighed a thousand tons. Leader of her people, founder of her race. She were worshipified throughout the realm of Deepholm. She were so fabulously wealthy with diamonds and rubies and other gems what I ain't even heard of that she didn't even bothers ta notice'em. She were Therazane, the Stonemother.

And me? I were just a simple orc from Durotar. But when our eyes met, I could tell....

She wanted me. She wanted me bad.

Who was I fer ta deny her?